Why did the monkey fall from the tree? Gravity

Why did the baby cross the road? His parents were drug addicts, and didn't pay him any attention.

Guy 1: Yo dawg Guy 2: DID yOU JUST FUCKING CALL ME A DOG>/?>/???? Guy 3: Yea

Why did the hedgehog cross the road? To return to its nest.

Q:"Wanna Here a Joke?" A:"Yea Sure" Q:"Why can't Stevie Wonder read?" A:"Umm....because he's blind?" Q:"No, because he's black."

Water, please.

What's the best part about a birthday cake? Eating it.

Hitler is my role model

Yo mamma is so fat, when Dracula bit her, he got type 2 diabetes.

I love my new microwave. It comes with a list that tells just how long to cook things. Now i know how long to cook a baby for

why did the chicken cross the road because everyone on the other side already had bird flu

Whats the difference........ between a duck?

your momma so ugly even she wouldnt date herself.

Why can't Helen Keller drive? Because she was born with the disorders of being blind and deaf. For any human, having blindness and deafness makes driving a near impossible task.

I love Ciara!

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why did bully fall of his bike He was eaten by a fridge

Why did Susie fall off the swing? She had no arms ... Knock knock Who's there? Not Susie

What do you tell a girl with 2 black eyes? You should ice those to preven swelling aron the eyes

3 men walk into a bar. The fourth one ducks.

What's worse than a dead baby in a trash can? The grief the family feels at the loss of their newborn child.

What do you call a Colombian who sells drugs? A pharmacist.

Q: Why did the chicken cross the road? A: Because he was forced, along with thousands of his poultry counterparts, on a march to meet their imminent death at a mass slaughterhouse. Upon being beheaded and processed, the meaty corpse was delivered to a local grocery store and cooked into a wholesome family dinner.

Why did the little boy cry? His entire family was shot and killed at his elementary school play.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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