What did the fish say when he ran into a wall underwater? dam

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What's meaty and has a poof? A meatball with a bubble.

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Why did the girl fall off of the swing? Because she had no arms.

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if quizzes are quizzical, then what are tests? testicle

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Did you hear about the guy with seven fingers? You should, because almost everybody has seven fingers.

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why did the parakeet eat the cracker? because it wanted to.

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Religion

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killing a baby and putting it in one bucket is one thing... but killing a baby and putting it in ten buckets is just insensitive

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Why do Squirrels accidentally plant millions of trees. Because they they bury their nuts and forget where they are.

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What do you call a dog with no legs? You don't, it won't come.

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Why did Tyrone attack? Because he was getting made fun of

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Hey, I want to because you are really sweet and deserve it, and damn you are hot, but thats secondary in your case, in every case actually, otherwise I would just be doing it with meat whose soul and thoughts I hate/dislike/detest/etc, and that is not who I am. Once huh? I mean I said night/day/shower/breakfast table... Not so sure I can last for that long with a girl as hot and sweet as you for that long. Kidding, hey, best friend huh? Wow, I mean that`s really sweet, and you are really a special friend to me, but uh, to be honest, best friend? I barely know you... I hate this part of myself, I am blunt with that honesty thing, I may just have insulted you, but you know, I also need to be able to live with myself If I am going to enjoy life.

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What do Jews, Jehovah's Witnesses, Slavs, Gays, and Retards have in common? The Holocaust.

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Why did Sally not get her permission slip signed? Because her parents where murdered. Why did Sally not think to ask her grandparents? Because there in jail for killing her parents.

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What does a tree do all day? Boredom

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Why did the Nigger fuck shit? He was a shit fucking Nigger.

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What's the difference between a dead dog in the road and a dead black guy in the road? It doesn't matter, I cried after both

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What's the best part about a birthday cake? Eating it.

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Why does World of Warcraft advertise on Anti-Joke? Because World of Warcraft is funny in anticlimactic and alternative way

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What is black, white, and red all over? A domino dipped in kitten blood.

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Boy: Doctor! Doctor! I can't see my arm! Doctor: It's because your blind son

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Small titties.

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Why did the girl go over her texting limit? She had a hot boyfriend.

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What's the difference between a baby and a watermelon? I can't stick my dick in a watermelon.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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