An Irish man, a Scottish man and an English man walk into a bar ... The Irish man's a bit dim, the Scotsman's tight with money and the Englishman's a bit of a racist.

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How does a black man make an anti joke? www.anti-joke.com/submit

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Homosexual babies? It's a choice

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What did Helen Keller's parents do to punish her? They gave her a stern talking to and then grounded her for a couple days.

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Q. What is brown and sticky? A. Creosote.

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What do you tell a girl with 2 black eyes? You should ice those to preven swelling aron the eyes

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like my drawing of a white person?

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Teen pregnancy

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Guy 1: there is this really funny knock knock joke. Ok you start. Guy 2: knock knock Guy 1: who's there Guy 2: umm what? I don't know

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Why did the unicorn cross the road? i dont know. unicorns arent real

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What did the mouse say to the elephant? Squeak.

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what does the doctor say to the patient. you have cancer

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Penis.

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Roses are Brown Violets are Brown I hate everyone on antijoke that steals what I write I fisted a cows butt hole.

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What do you call a douche with no arms or legs? A device for washing out the vagina as a contraceptive measure.

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Q: A black person and a white person decided to have a race, who won? A: The black person, as he exercised and worked out on a regular basis, making him very fast.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because he wanted to.

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A zucchini is walking down the street, when he spots a cucumber club on his left hand side. Having nothing else to do he decides to walk in. When he walks into the club all of the cucumbers stop and stare at this strange being in their club. Finally, after having one too many drinks, one cucumber decides that this ridiculousness has gone on long enough and it is up to him to say something, so he goes up to the zucchini and says, "Hey buddy, what's your problem, clearly you are in a cucumber club and you're a zucchini." The zucchini just looks at him, puzzled, and responds " A cucumber club? I thought this was a ucumber club!!!!!"... It's funny because zucchinis are dyslexic.

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Why did the small child fall down the stairs? Because he had lung cancer was in a wheel chair and I was incredibly tempted to push him down the stairs.

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How do you get a black man off a swing? ask him.

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What is the difference between my elbow and my penis? I Cant lick my elbow

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Why don`t women need watches? Because in our modern society, there are many clocks in most locations.

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How many Coldplay members can you fit in a car? All of them, the standard car has four seats or more. Coldplay has 4 members so it makes perfect logical sense

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Knock Knock Whos there Reality* Knock Knock *Opens Door*

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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