Why did Susie fall off the swing? She had no arms ... Knock knock Who's there? Not Susie

thumb_up thumb_down +49

What did the cab driver say to the duck who wanted a ride in the cab? Get out of the cab.

thumb_up thumb_down +49

Women's rights.

thumb_up thumb_down +49

Q: How much does a hipster weigh? A: It varies largely by hipster, the same way it does with any other person.

thumb_up thumb_down +47

A Poem that would be from a stocker: Roses are Red Violets are Blue I have a Gun Get in the Van and NOW!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

thumb_up thumb_down +45

What's the difference between me and you? Dr. Dre

thumb_up thumb_down +45

Why did the first koala fall out of the tree? because it was dead. Why the second koala fall out of the tree? because it was hit by the first koala. Why did the third koala fall out of the tree? because it thought it was a game.

thumb_up thumb_down +43

What type of food was the black guy eating? fruit, he is on a diet

thumb_up thumb_down +43

How do you get a movie star to go out with you? Blackmail.

thumb_up thumb_down +43

Lightening never strikes the same place twice. But it killed both my parents.

thumb_up thumb_down +41

A mute says to a paraplegic: You can talk the talk - but can you walk the walk?

thumb_up thumb_down +41

There once was a man from Peru Whose limericks stopped at line two (I sense the public demanding an encore) There once was a man from Verdun There's also a limerick about Emperor Nero, but I can't tell it to you.

thumb_up thumb_down +41

Whats black and has a large penis? A dog with large genitalia.

thumb_up thumb_down +41

What do you say when you wake up in the middle of the night to see your TV floating in midair? "I should probably lay off the hallucinogens."

thumb_up thumb_down +39

How do you know a dude is dead? He doesn't breath, he has no color in the face and his heart has stoped.

thumb_up thumb_down +39

What do you call a black guy in space? An astronaut

thumb_up thumb_down +39

what is fat and ugly. fat and ugly people

thumb_up thumb_down +37

Q: What happens when you throw a green rock in the Red Sea? A: It gets wet.

thumb_up thumb_down +37

Person 1: Do you want to hear a joke? Person 2: Sure! Person:1: That was the joke... You missed it!!!!!

thumb_up thumb_down +37

Why was John sad? His parents were murdered.

thumb_up thumb_down +37

How did Peter Parker tell his uncle that he was Spiderman? He didn't because he was already dead.

thumb_up thumb_down +37

Wanna hear a joke? The 19th amendment

thumb_up thumb_down +37

Two drums and a cymbal fall down a cliff. Ba-dum pssh.

thumb_up thumb_down +35

How did the fat man die? Clogged arteries leading to a heart attack.

thumb_up thumb_down +35

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops