What do you call 10,000 lawers jumping out of a plane? A good start.

Q. WHAT IS SPECIAL ABOUT GEORGE BUSH? A. NOTHING

Whats the difference between pizza and Jews Pizzas dont scream when their put in the oven

A man walks into a bar. The bartender asks what he'd like to drink. The man pulls out his gun, shoots the surprised bartender, and proceeds to execute all the patrons of the bar and finally commit suicide. A post-mortem identification of the man identifies him as a victim of childhood sexual abuse and a diagnosed schizophrenic. There is a nice funeral for all the victims and the media respectfully minimizes exposure of the event.

Did you know why people actually fear clowns? Because slapstick humor is dead

Why did Sarah fall off the swing? She didn't have any arms. Knock knock. Who's there? Not Sarah.

Why was Susie screaming profusely? Susie has autism.

Q: Why did the chicken cross the road? A: Because he was forced, along with thousands of his poultry counterparts, on a march to meet their imminent death at a mass slaughterhouse. Upon being beheaded and processed, the meaty corpse was delivered to a local grocery store and cooked into a wholesome family dinner.

What do you call a box with a dead Jew in? A coffin.

Guy 1: there is this really funny knock knock joke. Ok you start. Guy 2: knock knock Guy 1: who's there Guy 2: umm what? I don't know

Your mama is so....well we've been friends since childhood and I know your mother passed away recently. So, as to refrain from being an insensitive jerk to a good friend. I will tell this joke to someone with a mother who is fat, dumb, lazy, ugly, or has a combination of these traits. Or has none of these and happens to be a nice lady with a son/daughter who just enjoys a good mama joke.

A priest, a rabbi and a captain are in a sinking ship. The rabbi says let's save the children. The captain says f*ck the children. The priest days do we have time.

Why was my teacher depressed? Because she wanted to live in her pasta

Babies are like landmines; when you step on them they explode.

How many Alzheimer patients does it take to change a light bulb? To get to the other side!

A man had a terminal illness. He died a few months after he was diagnosed.

Q: Why did the chicken cross the road? A: Because he wanted to

Whats worse than finding one worm in your apple? Two worms.

A white man, a black man and a muslim walk into a bar. The bar explodes, but the white man is the only one that dies, thanks to reasonable accommodations.

What's worse than missing your favorite TV show? 9/11.

why did the chicken cross the road Why not

Q: Why couldn't Helen Keller drive? A: Because she is a woman.

2 peanuts were walking down the street, one was a salted .. the other was raped

A Mexican walked away from a construction site.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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