what did the black person say to the midget my dicks bigger than u

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Q:Why did the chicken cross the road A:Why does everyone want to know it's just a chicken

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why is 6 afraid of 7?? because 7 8 9

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How many dead babies can you fit in a cooler? 5. using a blender to puree` = 9

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What Mary short for? Due to the fact she has no legs, on account of the flesh eating she contracted after a visit to argentina thanks to the make-a-wish foundation. Mary also has cancer

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Why couldn't Little Timmy see the pirate movie? Because Little Timmy was blind.

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What's the best part about a birthday cake? Eating it.

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What did one lawyer say to the other lawyer? Horse semen

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What's more dangerous than bungee jumping without a rope? Getting into a car with Ben Colbert.

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Ever heard about the gray pipes that ran along the walls? Those pipes transmit gas. Gas killed the jews. You sick fucker.

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Whats the difference........ between a duck?

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If one train goes east at 30mph and another train goes south at 53mph, how many pancakes does it take to make a mattress? 7 because peanut butter can't climb trees.

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A hot girl walks by a boy and he stares at her as she walks past. She see's him and asks "What are you looking at?", to which the boy replied "Oh I'm sorry. You happened to look familiar and I thought 'Perhaps I've met this person before. School? No. Work? No. I then concluded I've never seen you before and then you turned around and asked me what I was looking at".

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your momma so ugly even she wouldnt date herself.

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Roses are red. Violets are blue. Onions stink. And so do you.

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Life is like a box of chocolates. You eat them. get fat. Die.

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"I have some pretty bad news for you, but to ease into it, I will try to work it into a conversation." -Alright Doctor, let's try that." "Hey, how are you feeling today?" -"I feel great!" "That's odd, because you have leukemia..."

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a blond, brunette, and red head run away from cops and hide in potato sacks. the officer went up to the brunette and kicked the potato bag and the brunette went "woof" "woof". the officer went to the red head and kicked the potato bag and the red head went "meow" "meow". the officer goes to the blond and kicked the potato bag and the blond went "potato".

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Wanna hear a joke? No.

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Roses Are Red Lemons are sour, open up your legs and give me an hour

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Why did the tomato blush? It didn't - red is the natural colour for ripe tomatoes.

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Jokes are funny.

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What does Lady Gaga call Hitler? Nothing special because she doesn't refer to him in everyday's speech.

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Why did Dave not hug his wife? Because she looked horrifying from the Iraq war.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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