why is the grass green? all the other colors in the electromagnetic spectrurm are absorbed except for green which is reflected and thats the only visable color

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I like my women like I like my coffee... Without a penis.

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*ring ring ring* hello? This is a robbery... Dum dum dum.... (hangs up) *beep beep beep*

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What walks like a duck, talks like a duck, but doesn't look like a duck? A horse named Quackie

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My Girlfriend

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I told my friend a joke. He didn't laugh, I asked why. He said he was autistic and he does not understand humor.

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Why was six afraid of seven? Because seven shot up his school and ate nine kids. Also before he was arrested he told six he was going to blow his brains out. Then he murdered the police and has been on the run ever since.

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Why is the world round? The early earth was molten, and a liquid in a vacuum subject only to its own gravitational forces will assume the shape of a sphere. Gases will behave in the same manner. The effects of the sun and other planets, plus the rotational effect have caused the earth to assume a round shape.

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An Arab walks into a bar. He then blows up the bar.

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How do you make a napkin dance? You can't. Stop having such unrealistic aspirations.

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Why did the blonde cross the road? Because she was stupid.

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What is worse worse than stubbing your toe? The Holocaust.

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Making jokes about 9/11 is just plane wrong.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because chickens have feeble minds and tend to wander around.

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American Idol

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Whats white and cant fly an aeroplane? A fridge

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What are the things that define you? The things that define you.

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why cant the black man vote? because hes not 18 yet.

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What did Tom get for Christmas? Gloves, but Tom had no arms. Knock knock? Who's there? NOT TOM

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Yo mamas so fat, that she brought a spoon to the super bowl!

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What olympic event is Kosovo best known for getting gold? Kosovo is the world's newest country and therefore does not yet have complete international recognition.

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Q: What's the difference between a trampoline and a pile of dead babies? A: You can't wear cleats on a trampoline.

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Looking for a job in this economy is like trying to find employment during an extreme economic downturn.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Various reasons, one of which was to visit his wife in hospital where she was suffering from a sever case of depression. The other reason was to say his last words to her as she also has lung cancer.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops