What happened to the orphan on Christmas? he got raped

Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 was infamous for stealing people's laundry, and 6 was insecure about his bare body

My wife and I have been married for ten years. She is a great care-taker and I couldn't be more happy. Then she asked me to make her a sandwich, I went to the kitchen and into the knife drawer...well I think you can guess what happened after that. I cut the meats, and I made her a sandwich.

Whats worst than being attacked by a tiger? Being attacked by 2 tigers.

your momma is so stupid she failed math class

whats the differnce between a baby and a dart board? dart boards dont bleed.

Q: How do you fit a giraffe inside a refrigerator? A: You can't, it is physically impossible...

So this guy drunk guy pokes this girl. 4 months later the girl has a misscarrage.

How did the blond die? Substance abuse

What do you say when you wake up in the middle of the night to see your TV floating in midair? "I should probably lay off the hallucinogens."

Why doesn't Santa come in the summer? Because it's not Christmas.

What does a Mexican do in a landslide? Lose a good deal of his hard earned property to the disaster.

whats the difference between a black person , spook and a porchmoney.... there is none there all stupid stinky n-ag-ger-s

How many blondes does is take to screw a man? one and a condem

Why did the plane crash? Because the pilot was a piece of toast.

What's worse than missing your favorite TV show? 9/11.

here's a great way to ruin someone's 'knock knock' joke: Knock knock Come in!

Knock knock Who's there? What.

yo mama so fat, she wheres glasses to see better!

Knock, Knock. Who's there? Disc . Disc Who. Disconnected.

Why was the asian guy's eyes slanted? Your question is a very valid one that most people often wonder, but never really ask. It's called an epicanthal fold...please, NOT "slanted eyes". Many people consider this to be a derogatory description of the descendents or those of Eastern Asia (as do I, being half Korean), but most people are unaware of this and say it anyway. I'll assume you didn't know this. :) The epicanthal fold (what we have) is something that all babies are born with, but those who may not be of Eastern Asian origin will eventually lose. The purpose of this "fold" is to protect the eyes from extreme sunlight and cold weather. Most people of the this part of Asia originated in Mongolia where the weather conditions were very cold and harsh. Also, with most of this population, you'll notice that there exists some extra padding below the eyes as well. With all that white snow and the sunlight reflecting off of it, don't you think with time our bodies would develop some sort of defense for one of our most valued senses--our sight? It makes sense, doesn't it? Also, notice, that the farther south you travel in Eastern Asia the "rounder" the eye gets (their is less evidence of the epicanthal fold), since the climate gets warmer the farther south you go. Evolution, baby. So, Eastern Asian eyes are NOT really slanted. They just appear to be. Instead they just have that extra fold above the eyes that make them appear "thinner", if you will. If you want to sound halfway intelligent, please don't use the description "slanted eyes" anymore, since this will only make you seem like somewhat of a bigot (racist). (You might say it around the wrong person one day.) Sorry, but I'm just trying to give you some good advice. I hope I helped.

What does AIDS stand for? Acquired immune deficiency syndrome

Roses are red Violets are blue Little billy was annoying me But he can't anymore Because now he's dead In a burlap sack In the back of my truck And it's really bloody back there

What's better than winning the lottery? Winning it twice.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

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The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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