roses are red, violets are blue, I talk to myself, and so do it I.

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Why couldn't the 14 year old find a date? Because he had a speech impediment and girls avoided him usually.

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GONNA

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Why did Dave not hug his wife? Because she looked horrifying from the Iraq war.

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I'm so hungry, I could eat an adequately sized meal

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whats the differnce between a baby and a dart board? dart boards dont bleed.

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Did you know why people actually fear clowns? Because slapstick humor is dead

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Why don't they sell pharmaceuticals in the rain forest? Because it is to sparsely populated and not economically viable.

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What did Batman say to Robin before he got in the car? Get in the car

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memes

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like my drawing of a white person?

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Hey, want to hear a joke? Women's Rights

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how do u get a nun off the bottom of a cruise ship you untie her

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What is red and bad for your teeth? A brick.

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Women's rights

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The little mouse lifted the giant Elephant up so the Elephant could reach the bag of snacks, but then the Elephant said: I cant reach it, you must be tired so lets switch places... Squish: Squish! Elephant: Mouse! Where are you! *looks at "squish" NO! THIS WAS NOT THE WAY THE JOKE WAS SUPPOSED TO BE!!!!!!! Moral: Elephants cant talk...

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How do you make a baby cry? You throw a brick at it. How do you make it stop crying? You throw another brick at it.

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A woman gets in her car to drive.

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Who was worse than Hitler? Justin Bieber

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Teen pregnancy

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What did the moose say to the hunter? I don't know, what? Nothing, a moose is an animal therefore it can't say anything.

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What do you call a douche with no arms or legs? A device for washing out the vagina as a contraceptive measure.

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Stevie wonder walks across the road without looking both ways.

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What is the difference between Terri Schaivo and a basket of rotting vegetables? The rotting vegetables aren't edible.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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