What's worse than a woman driver? Getting a cactus shoved up your ass.

A black guy walks into a bar with a beatiful parrot on his shoulder. "Wow," says the bartender. "That is really something. Where'd you get it?" The parrot was his fathers. Do to severe mental and physical illness, he can no longer take care of it. He asked his son to take it, those were his last words as he slipped into a coma

Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't, it got hit by a car.

What happens when you push an asian in a hole? He falls in

Did you know Dr Pepper isn't really a doctor?

What did Jesus say to the Easter Rabbit? Nothing, it ran off before he could say anything. They're so skiddish, those pesky rabbits...

96

If I have 10 apples and you have 45 oranges how many plates can we fit on the roof? Purple because monkeys don’t fly

*ring ring ring* hello? This is a robbery... Dum dum dum.... (hangs up) *beep beep beep*

How are a plum and a rabbit alike? Theyre both purple except for the rabbit.

What do you get when you mix a fox and a sloth? a..FOTH

what do an black ,am and a bicycle have in comman there both objects

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because chickens have feeble minds and tend to wander around.

The glass is half an hour.

- knock knock. ... - knock knock. ... - heey! ... (There is nobody at home.)

Why can't stars marry? Because they are masses of incandescent gas and thus have no feelings.

guns don't kill people. casey anthoney kills people.

Roses are red. Violets are blue. I have Alzheimer's. Where are the keys?

How do you get a clown off a swing? Hit it in the face with an axe

Making jokes about 9/11 is just plane wrong.

Whats ironic about the Facebook "like" button? Nothing

What was the color blind boy's favorite color? I don't know? neither did he

Why does a chicken lay an egg? If she'd throw it, it would break.

Why did the girl fall out of the swing? Because she had no arms. They were lost in a tractor accident.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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