What is Chuck Norris's favorite musical theme? Tanana na na naa naa na, ta ta ta tanana na naa na ta na na.

i yoused to cry a little when i laughed . then i got raped by a clown.

Why was Ray Charles always smiling? because he was a happy guy

HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA

What do a grape and a spider have in common? Both have 8 legs..... Except for the grape.

Why did Susie fall off of the swing? She was hit by an asteroid.

What did the man tell his parents after having sex with another man? A. I am gay.

What do you call a chicken with its head cut off? A dead chicken. Most likely ready to be cooked/eaten

Your Mom

Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't. It was in the oven

a man walks into a bar..... the man pulls out a gun and robs the place as he is exiting he bumps into a child the child falls in the street and is crushed by a bus. the bus in an attempt to avoid the child swerves and hits a maternity clinic next to a gas station that promptly explodes. the robber so distraught he trys to shoot himself but the gun misfired and the man was arrested and was raped repeatedly in prison...he now has aids...

If I have 10 apples and you have 45 oranges how many plates can we fit on the roof? Purple because monkeys don’t fly

everyone's always talking about the emperor's clothes, don't they know this is murica

Why was the little girl lying on the floor. Because she got shot.

What is the same about a girrafe, and an ant? They are both REALLY tall. Except for the ant, sorry I lied.

Why did the chicken cross the road? It was being chased by a wolf that eventually killed and ate it.

A black guy walks into a bar with a beatiful parrot on his shoulder. "Wow," says the bartender. "That is really something. Where'd you get it?" The parrot was his fathers. Do to severe mental and physical illness, he can no longer take care of it. He asked his son to take it, those were his last words as he slipped into a coma

How are a plum and a rabbit alike? Theyre both purple except for the rabbit.

I came.

what do rappers cover? ->CANDY CREDITS: ANUJ NARAYAN VARMA from Leland high school

Yo mamma so fat that she was chosen to be a contestant on the Biggest Loser and we are all so proud of the amount of weight she has lost.

Why did the plane crash? Because the pilot was a loaf of bread.

What's red and green? A frog in a blender

I am just trying to grasp the terms you use Nero, you are a genius, I mean I always heard about it, but honestly, well, my first impression of you here was... Different.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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