There once was a rich man who owned a really big mansion, he's a very organised man and likes routine, every day at 6.30pm he goes for an hour long jog. One day he goes out for his jog, when he gets back his mansion is on fire and he can see a little orange man running away in the distance. But he thinks nothing of it. The man has lost a lot of money, but can still afford to move into a slighty smaller, yet still very large house. The next day he goes out for his jog and when he gets back his big house is on fire and again, he sees the little orange man running away in the distance. He thinks nothing of it, but has now lost even more money, and has to move into a regular size house. The next day he goes out for his jog, when he gets back his house is on fire and again he sees the little orange man running away in the distance. He thinks nothing of it and has lost even more money. He is really gutted by this point and now has to move into a single bedroom flat. The next day he goes out for his jog, when he gets back his flat is on fire and again he sees a little orange man running away in the distance. He still thinks nothing of it and has now lost all his money, and has to move into a cardboard box under a bridge. The next day he goes out for his jog, when he gets back his cardboard box is on fire and again he sees a little orange man running away in the distance. He is sick of this and decides to chase the little orange man. When he catches him he tackles him to the ground, turns him over and asks.. did you burn down my mansion, my big house, my average sized house, my flat, and my box? The little orange man replies no.

Why was my teacher depressed? Because she wanted to live in her pasta

A priest, a rabbi and a captain are in a sinking ship. The rabbi says let's save the children. The captain says f*ck the children. The priest days do we have time.

How many Alzheimer patients does it take to change a light bulb? To get to the other side!

Why is Helen Keller a bad driver? Because her inability to see or hear makes her an extremely dangerous road hazard.

Babies are like landmines; when you step on them they explode.

666 im christian

Q: Why did the chicken cross the road? A: Because he wanted to

why did the chicken cross the road Why not

A white man, a black man and a muslim walk into a bar. The bar explodes, but the white man is the only one that dies, thanks to reasonable accommodations.

yo mama so fat, she wheres glasses to see better!

i said why are you disliking me he said its anti joke

Chuck Norris died.

Roses are red, Violets are blue, You have AIDS, I'm very sorry

How do you get four gay guys on a bar stool? With teamwork and coordination, each could place one foot on the seat, and they can all stand up using each other for balance and support. The fact that they are gay in unimportant.

What did the white man hand to the mexican? His college degree because the mexican had completed all four years of college with a 4.0 GPA.

What does a girl get from a dead MAN:)?? Nothing he is dead.

What's worse than the titanic sinking 9-11

Roses are red, Violets are blue, You're allergic to flowers So this poem will kill you

Knock Knock. Whose there? Not your dead mom.

why did the rooster cross the road? because it was stapled to the chicken

Wy did Bryan eet his Dumbelllle? Anderson fell asleep again

Why did the monkey eat his own poop? Because there was minimal resources where he was so he resorted to eat his own fecal matter

Why does 4 +5 = Hitler? It doesnt it equals 9.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...