How much is an abortion? A life

How did the dog die? It was wet because of the rain so the little boy put him in the microwave for 30 minutes to warm him up

Q. Why was the cat brown? A. because it was a maori

Why is the child screaming? Because he just woke up from a bad dream.

Knock Knock.... Knock Knock.... Knock Knock.... I guess no ones home.

A Ferrari Enzo and a Toyota Prius were having a street race. The Driver of the Ferrari died after he was hit by a bus.

What's the difference of a team of black people and a pile of shit? None. Kelvin Yang.

What's the difference between a lamborghini and a sackful of dead babies? one is a car and the other is a grotesque travesty.

Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 recently got out of prison for violent rape.

Busted? What the hell is going on?

Why did the mushroom go to the party??? Cuzz he was a fungi (fun guy)

Q-How do you kill an elephant? A- An elephant gun Q- How do you kill a blue elephant? A- A blue elephant gun Q- How do you kill a red elephant? A- Strangle it until it turns blue then use a blue elephant gune Q- How do you kill a purple elephant? A- Don't be ridiculous purple elephants don't exist

why was the man coughing? because there was a knife in his throat.

roses are red Jacob's a Jew the holocaust was funny Haha f**k you

Q: what did the boy get for Christmas A: a new wheel chair his legs were recently amputated due to the same cancer that killed terry fox.

Im gonna Rape that Liberato kid you was talking about, ALL UP THE ASS i will find him.

How do you get a baby out of a blender? Tortilla Chips

What's worse than finding gum stuck on the bottom of your desk? A clown following you around carrying a shotgun and throwing toothbrushes at you.

what's your favorite soccer team? liverpool

What do you call a pickle with a cape? A pickle with a cape

"So, how's life in North Korea?" "Well, I can't complain."

Why did the chicken cross the road? I don't know, go ask the chicken.

If Vegetarians eat vegetables, what do humanitarians eat? Probably both plant life, sea-based creatures, and land-based animals. However, depending on the personal preference of the person, they can also be a vegetarian or not. They could also be cannibals, but the literal definition of humanitarian would go against any cannibalistic traditions due to the fact that humanitarians help others for the benefit of humanity as a whole, eating people would go against such beliefs.

What did the apple tree say to the farmer? Well! since trees nor apples have the ability to talk I would say the apple tree said nothing. And if the farmer thinks it did say something he should visit the doctors to check his hearing. The End.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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