How many Jews can fit in a VW Beetle? 2 in the front, 3 in the back, and maybe one in the trunk, but that wouldn't be very comfortable.

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What did the mail man say to the resident? I have your mail. Now let's f*ck.

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arse

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How do you get your wife to stop nagging? chop off her head

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Hi! This is Richard Young, I'll take it from here Ms.Mcgruder, lets find a quiet place to talk about this, e.c. at 5:00 p.m. tomarrow.

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Do you want to hear a joke? Well, I do too.

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What do you call cheese thats not yours? Somebody elses cheese

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Q: What did the anorexic girl do for thanksgiving? A: Nothing, she was paralyzed from a fall 2 days prior and nobody had found her yet.

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a

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Boy: BRB Girl: OK. *Two hours later* Boy: Back. Girl: What took you so long? Boy: Someone asked why I loved you. Girl: Aw, that's so s- Boy: I know! I had no idea who he was! I had to call the cops.

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What happened to the jew? He got shoved in an oven.

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What notes does the tightrope-musician have to worry about? They probably have to concentrate generally harder than the average musician in order to produce any correct, good quality notes.

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Why did the man pee his pants? Because he was paralyzed from the waste down and had no way of feeling

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Q: What do AIDS and rape have in common? A: If you play guard for the Lakers, neither will affect you.

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A baby seal walks into a club...

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Why wasn't Pat able to get an erection? Because Pat is a girl.

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When I was at the beach digging in the sand I looked down and someone said nehow

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What do a grape and a reindeer have in common? They're both purple, except the reindeer.

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A guy named Dick goes into a bar and the barman says: - "hey, show my your dick" - "show you my what?" asks Dick. - "your dick!" - "oh! no, I'm shy"

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Q.What is the bigest lie in the universe? A. I have read and agree the the Terms of Service.

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I just made up a joke! How many women does it take to screw in a light bulb? Seven. The ending needs some work...

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Why was the girl crying? She got kicked in the vagina

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Man :A homo-sexual panda walks into a gay bar.... Homo-sexual Panda : Wait...wait I'm gonna stop you right there. I will not take part in this odd joke, so just ummmmmm ya. And another thing, my species is extremely offended by your inferior remarks. Why can't homosexual panda just have piece? Man 1: Were the hell did you come from? Homo-sexual Panda: My mother's uterus same as you, retard.

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Why did the Catholic priest get excommunicated from the church? He couldn't read.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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