what did the monkey say to the breast cancer?

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a man walks into a bar..... the man pulls out a gun and robs the place as he is exiting he bumps into a child the child falls in the street and is crushed by a bus. the bus in an attempt to avoid the child swerves and hits a maternity clinic next to a gas station that promptly explodes. the robber so distraught he trys to shoot himself but the gun misfired and the man was arrested and was raped repeatedly in prison...he now has aids...

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Knock knock! Who's there? Boo. Oh hey man, you got the meth?

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Why couldn't the little boy see anything? It was dark outside.

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whats the difference between a snail? - both legs are the same lenght, especially the left one.

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Why is the little boy crying on the side of the street? He fell and skinned his knee.

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whats pink and fluffy pink fluff

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What's white and can't climb a tree? A refridgerator What's white heavy and if it fell out of a tree it would kill you? A polar bear

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What's worse than a woman driver? Getting a cactus shoved up your ass.

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Why did the boy commit suicide? Because he was bullied at school and felt it was the right decision.

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What's black and white, and red all over? newspaper...

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Q: why did the little girl cry on Christmas? A: because she got a dead cat.

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if it takes skill to trip over a flat surface, i have no skill...

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What's so funny about an anti-joke? Nothing.

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Two scientists walk into a bar. The first one says “I’ll have some H2O.” The second says “I’ll have some H2O too.” Then he dies.

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A man is walking alone in a park and stumbles upon a lamp. He rubs the lamp and a genie appears out of thin air. The genie tells him he has three wishes to wish for whatever his heart desires. The man naturally wishes for Anthony Davis to shave his damn unibrow. He then throws the lamp at a little boys face and laughs uncontrollably.

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Write your own

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Did you know?

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What do you call a lettuce named Andrew? Andrew.

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When I'm through with you... They will never find your body... And even if they did... All they find would be teeth!!!

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What did the prostitute say to the cop? What? I can suck your dick for free Mr. Officer

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So a man dipped his balls in sloppy joe sauce.

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Justin Bieber paid a donation to the anti-homosexual orginization.

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Ancient Greeks rights

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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