What is 69? A two digit number.

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What do you get when you cross a horse and a pony? A mule

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Why did the chicken cross the road it was out of its coop

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Why did the mexican cross the road....... To find work so he can support his starving family

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While on a business trip, a Jim got a call on his cell phone. It was his best friend. He was informing Jim of his wife's death in a terrible train crash. She didn't die on impact, but her legs were cut off by metal debris from the train car in front of her. She fought against the pain and used a shirt she found from a dead body to stop the bleeding. She managed to drag herself to the nearest road crossing, where someone drove her to the hospital. Despite her efforts to survive and the surgeons efforts to save her, she died that night as a result of excessive blood loss. After he hung up, Jim turned up the ringer volume on his phone because he couldn't hear it very well when it rang.

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Knock Knock Who's There Ur Mom Ur Mom Who Ur Mom is Dead

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What did the terrorist have for breakfast? Scrambled eggs and a glass of orange juice.

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How do you get a baby out of a blender? Call the police and have them deal with the tragedy.

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Why couldn't the boy ride his bike? He had no legs. Why didn't he have any legs? He was hit by a truck.

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Who flexes triceps more than anyone? James

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Jim fell of his bike, wanna know how. Someone threw a car at him. Knock knock, who's there, not Jim

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How did the ruttabaga believe itself to be a ruttabaga? Because it was in fact NOT a ruttabaga, but some self-aware individual with delusions.

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How are a plum and a rabbit alike? Theyre both purple except for the rabbit.

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roses are red violets are black why is your chest as flat as my back

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Why was the little boy sad? Because he had a fox stapled to his face.

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Q: Ask me if I'm a tree. A: No, I am not a tree.

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3 blonds walk into a bar ouch

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what do a plum and a rabbit have in common? there both purple except for the rabbit

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what did the joke say to the anti-joke? do you want to fight

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Why can't a T-Rex clap his hands? Because its dead

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A black man, a Mexican, and a Jew walk into a bar. The white bartender kills them all because he was a huge racist.

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penis that is all

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Has anyone told you, you look fat today?" "Because you don't.

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What do you call two Mexicans playing basketball? A game of one-on-one basketball in a common physical education class in present day mexico city.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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