Today, I had intercourse with a teddy bear

penis that is all

Why was the girl crying? She got kicked in the vagina

whats the difference between a blonde and a brunette? A. Genetics.

a

What do you call cheese thats not yours? Somebody elses cheese

Q: What is long and hard? A: The gun used to kill my parents.

Your Mom

What is red and invisible? No tomatoes.

A man. That is all.

A man is walking alone in a park and stumbles upon a lamp. He rubs the lamp and a genie appears out of thin air. The genie tells him he has three wishes to wish for whatever his heart desires. The man naturally wishes for Anthony Davis to shave his damn unibrow. He then throws the lamp at a little boys face and laughs uncontrollably.

What did the drug addict get for Christmas? He got hepatitis, fired from his job, and nothing from his family because their relationship was badly damaged by his addiction.

one day tiarnan got banged by a goat

-Knock Knock -Who is it? -Your father, i forgot my keys.

how do you call a boomerang that does not come back? - a stick

Q.What is the bigest lie in the universe? A. I have read and agree the the Terms of Service.

What is the difference between a grape and an elephant? They are both grapes, except for the elephant.

Women's Rights

I came.

Why don't you have a seat, over there?

Why was the elderly, Asian, blond pulled over by the officer? She was, and has been completely blind since birth.

My mom.

Two scientists walk into a bar. The first one says “I’ll have some H2O.” The second says “I’ll have some H2O too.” Then he dies.

What do you call a man who just came home from a 72-hour work shift ? You don't call him, you let him sleep.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...