Child birth. So easy women can do it.

Why is 6 afraid of 7? Six hasn't been the same since he left Vietnam. Every time he closes his eyes, he's sees Charlie hiding in the darkness of the forest. Not that you could ever see those bastards, mind you. They were fast and they knew their way around the jungle. He remembers the looks on the boy's faces when they walked into that village and... oh Jesus. He shouldn't think about that now. Sometimes he still hears Tex's slow southern drawl. He remembers the smell of Brooklyn's cigarettes. He always had a pack of Luckys. But the boys are gone now... he knows that. It's--it's just that he forgets sometimes. And sometimes the way that seven looks at him... it makes him think. Sets him on edge. And he feels like he's back there... In the jungle... In the darkness. Seven has a hook for a hand as well, which is very scary.

Sudden Infant Death Syndrome.

What's the difference between a dead baby and a watermelon? I don't cum on my watermelon before I eat it.

whats more serious than rape... the holocaust

One time a man cut off Chuck Norris while driving, and Chuck Norris kindly excused the man's lack of consideration for his fellow drivers.

What do you call five white guys sitting on a bench? THe NBA

What's brown, dusty, and full of male? My asshole.

Why did the chicken cross the road? -I don't care

where do you get virgin wool from? ugly sheep.

What's worse than finding a real joke on anti-joke? Finding a repeated joke about no armed susy falling off a swing.

Why do women fake orgasms? Because they want to give men the impression that they have climaxed.

What's worse than biting into your apple and finding a worm in it? Biting into you apple and finding two worms in it.

I have read and agree to the Terms of Service

A Banana wrote this...

Did you hear about Judith? she was hit by a bus!

"did you hear about the midget's self-murder?" "No, what happend?" "He jumped off the curb"

ive got 99 problems and my diabetes is one of them

I am a real homosexual

Ha

Get your coat, I've got a knife.

What do you call a pregnant girl? Your Ex

One time I was playing hide and seek with grandma but I couldn't seem to find her. I asked my sister for help and she told me she was hiding in the living room on the shelf. I went into the living room but all I saw was a vase on the shelf. Grandma probably didn't know the game was over so I opened the vase to tell her. To this day she hasn't come out of the vase.

Did you hear the one about the blonde who went to the grocery store? She walked in, purchased the items that she specified on her shopping list, then left and went to her daughter's piano recital.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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