Humpty Dumpty didn't fall I pushed him

A woman goes to the hospital to receive an ultra-sound after taking a pregnancy test a few weeks before. The doctor comes out and says "Congratulations Susanne would you like to know the results? Susanne says "No thank you." Then, the doctor says "Good, because its actually a retarded baby that we found."

What's funnier than a midget bungie jumping? Nothing

What did the guy do with the tv remote? Turn on the tv

Two muffins are in the oven, one looks at the other and says, "it sure is hot in here." The other responds, "AAhHH a TALKING MUFFIN."

what do you call a duck with no legs? a sitting duck

Why couldn't the prostitute count to 70? She grew up in a poor family and couldn't pay for a good education.

Do you like fishsticks? If so you are not a homosexual fish as fishsticks are a frozen food rather than fish genitalia.

What did the women order for dessert? Pie.

What is really hard around Kim Kardashian? Diamonds.

What's worse than a bee sting? The Holocaust. What's worse than the Holocaust? Three bee stings.

What is red and not there? No tomatoes.

KIMBERLEY HONEY

What do you call a school bus full of white kids? A school bus.

Peas and Corn. Porn., a deer

What olympic event is Kosovo best known for getting gold? Kosovo is the world's newest country and therefore does not yet have complete international recognition.

john liked the paper........ so he took it

Whats white and cant fly an aeroplane? A fridge

I'm not wearing any underwear. Why? Because I am have built in underwear. ;)

What's the difference between a ferrari and a sack of babies? I don't have a ferrari in my garage.

Three guys walk into a club, one is a fat ugly chode face bastard, the second one is a 4 foot 2 cricket champion and the third is a handsome young man.

I like vagina, hahahahah!!!!!!!!!!

How do racist jokes start? Generally with a racially insensitive stereotype.

What is brown and sticky? A masturbating Negro.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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