Okay so two penquins are sitting in a bathtub when one asks the other "Hey pass the soap!". The other one jokingly replies "what do I look like a typewriter?"

thumb_up thumb_down +18

What is black and hangs from a tree in my backyard? My neighbors children.

thumb_up thumb_down +16

what is the difference between a black person and a picnic bench? A picnic bench can support a family.

thumb_up thumb_down +16

Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because 6 was racist.

thumb_up thumb_down +16

If a wheel falls off a bus whilst travelling down a river, how long does it take to shingle a doghouse? None, because there are no bones in cottage cheese.

thumb_up thumb_down +16

Doctor, Doctor I keep getting pains in the eye when I drink coffee! It's not the coffee, you have a deadly case of ocular melanoma, a form of cancer that affects the eye. You'll be blind within the next 24 hours.

thumb_up thumb_down +16

A boy goes into Mourne View and meets a girl what happens next? He's now a father living off of the dole.

thumb_up thumb_down +16

Do you think people can change? No. They can change their mind.

thumb_up thumb_down +14

Hollywood presents: "HELP US MARIO! THE WORLD IS BEING OVERWHELMED BY KOOPA AND HIS FORCES OF TURTLES!" "What the hell do you want me to do? I am a damn plumber, squish them? Besides they are just turtles" "Oh yeah..." Steven Spielberg: Get bay on this script, at least its much better than the first one.

thumb_up thumb_down +14

Wow, thats warming to the core Nero, you are really sweet when you want to, I was having a lot more than second thoughts, I mean I do not mind the thought of sex with you really and I mean that, but losing who I already consider my best friend would just be sad. So uh, sex once huh? I mean, one more feather on the uh, hat thing, is that what this is about to you?

thumb_up thumb_down +14

i yoused to cry a little when i laughed . then i got raped by a clown.

thumb_up thumb_down +14

why did i go on the rollercoaster? because there was a muffin on it

thumb_up thumb_down +14

what does chuck norris use to cut scissors? another scissor.

thumb_up thumb_down +14

Time flies like a banana.

thumb_up thumb_down +14

Yeah, totally.

thumb_up thumb_down +14

Knock Knock Who is there? You have no Dick

thumb_up thumb_down +14

What do you call five white guys sitting on a bench? THe NBA

thumb_up thumb_down +14

cut it out ..but i dont have a scissor

thumb_up thumb_down +12

What do you get a black guy when he is hungry? Something edible.

thumb_up thumb_down +12

wheres a good place to find funny jokes? anti-joke.com

thumb_up thumb_down +12

Are you Jewish? No. That's what Anne Frank said, too.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

whats worse than flunking math? death.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

Pirate ships are used by pirates.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

??????????????(?)/// ????????(^0^)/

thumb_up thumb_down +10

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops