What did the Engineer say to the English major? Hey we went to the same school and got different degrees! Cool!

women's lacrosse.

Why did the first monkey fall out of the tree ? Because he was dead. Why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? Because he was attached to the first monkey. Why did the third monkey fall out of the tree? Because he thought it was a game. Why did the tree fall over? It thought it was a monkey.

Roses are Brown Violets are Brown I hate everyone on antijoke that steals what I write I fisted a cows butt hole.

knock knock. who's there? I am. I am who? I am pregnant

Do you know why your mom is so bold? Becaus she's got cancer

What do you call a douche with no arms or legs? A device for washing out the vagina as a contraceptive measure.

A man walks into a bar. He asks the bartender for a glass of milk. The bartender says, "Sorry we don't serve milk here.

"This is not a drill!" - guy holding a hammer

Why did the small child fall down the stairs? Because he had lung cancer was in a wheel chair and I was incredibly tempted to push him down the stairs.

Whats worse than a bunch of teen-agers throwing kitrens at my house I didn't save them because I thought they were jehovahs witness's

What is the difference between my elbow and my penis? I Cant lick my elbow

Why don`t women need watches? Because in our modern society, there are many clocks in most locations.

What do you get when you kill a black man? The death penalty.

What do you say to jacks mum when your having Sex? Nothing she's dead.

Why did the man walk into a bar? Well hell I don't know I thought you might.

What's worse than missing your favorite TV show? 9/11.

Ask me if I'm a tree Are you a tree? No.

I like my coffee like I like my women Without a penis

How many Coldplay members can you fit in a car? All of them, the standard car has four seats or more. Coldplay has 4 members so it makes perfect logical sense

Why do cows have tails? Because my pet rock stopped breathing.

Why did the girl hang herself? She was constantly bullied in school and on the internet.

What do you call someone who is blind and deaf? Dumb.

if japanese cars are called riceburners would german cars be called jewburners

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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