Why didn't the black man pay for his child support bills? He made some unwise financial decisions in the past and is working three part time jobs just to stay afloat.

thumb_up thumb_down +17

What's white and sticky? Glue

thumb_up thumb_down +17

Women's rights.

thumb_up thumb_down +17

What did the rape victim say to the rapist? "mmfff...mmm.....mmmmm"

thumb_up thumb_down +15

What did Abe Lincoln say before he gave the Gettysburg Address? No one knows, its not documented.

thumb_up thumb_down +15

A black man is packing heat while driving his car. He is a police officer

thumb_up thumb_down +15

what happened to the chicken that crossed the road? it got hit by a taco truck

thumb_up thumb_down +15

Knock knock, Knock knock jokes aren't funny.

thumb_up thumb_down +15

Why did the monkey scream? He was hungry

thumb_up thumb_down +15

wheres a good place to find funny jokes? anti-joke.com

thumb_up thumb_down +13

What did the boy with cancer get for christmas? -A haircut

thumb_up thumb_down +13

I don't always drink beer, but when I do, I drink water!

thumb_up thumb_down +13

There were 3 children: Flower, Petal and Fridge. Flower asked, "Mum, why is my name Flower?" to which she replied "Because a flower was the first thing to fall on you when you were born." Petal asked, "Mum, why is my name Petal?" to which she replied "Because a petal was the first thing to fall on you when you were born." Fridge said, "Herp derp dur" to which Fridge's mother replied "Shut up, Fridge."

thumb_up thumb_down +13

Roses are red Violets are blue I own a lawn mower Can you swim?

thumb_up thumb_down +13

I just made up a joke! How many women does it take to screw in a light bulb? Seven. The ending needs some work...

thumb_up thumb_down +11

What did the black man say to the jewish man? Hello.

thumb_up thumb_down +11

What do you call a black person trying to swim? Wet.

thumb_up thumb_down +11

Wife: Do you know what the most untruthful lie I've told you? Husband: What? Wife: That I love you. By the way I'm leaving you for your father. The twins are gay and in love with each other and your daughter is a hooker with AIDS. Your mother killed herself upon hearing all this news. She suffered a lot. Oh, the dog died by rat poisoning that your dad put in the backyard. Bye.

thumb_up thumb_down +11

Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't, it got hit by a car.

thumb_up thumb_down +9

You can lead a horse to water, but you can't put it in a basket.

thumb_up thumb_down +9

How do you catch a squirrel? Use a live, humane trap, and release it back into the wild afterwards.

thumb_up thumb_down +9

why did i go on the rollercoaster? because there was a muffin on it

thumb_up thumb_down +9

Why did the man have cold feet on his wedding day? The wedding was outside in the winter.

thumb_up thumb_down +7

Roses are red, Violets are blue, I don't have cancer, but you do. Love, your doctor.

thumb_up thumb_down +7

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops