how did the chicken cross the road. it didnt.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? He farted

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Jesus walks into a hotel, slams four nails down on the counter, and says, "Put me up for the night!" The concierge looks at him and says, "You're not Jesus. Jesus was brutally murdered approximately 1,970 years ago. And although I may not be a believer, his teachings have brought comfort and solace to millions of people around the world. Nor do we accept nails as payment. Please remove yourself from the premises or I will call security."

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What do you call Obama? - the president

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Whoa! A talking carrot!

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How do you make a dog drink? You put the dog in a blender

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Knock Knock Who's there? The police, your wife just died

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Roses are red Violets are blue I'm not a very good poet

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How many women does it take to screw in a light bulb? Who knows? They all just sit and bitch about it.

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What's worse than failing out of high school? Finding out your mom has cancer.

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What do you call a fish without an eye? fsh.

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What's the most annoying thing in the world? Yourself. (Your friends are saying it too, behind your back)

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A hot girl walks past a boy and the boy turns around and watches her pass. The girl sees the boy staring and asks with a slight attitude, "What are you looking at?", to which the boy replied, "Well, I noticed you walking towards me and I couldn't help but think 'Hmm..she looks familiar. Have I seen her at school? No. Work? No. Somewhere else? Perhaps.' I then concluded that I've never seen you before and then you turned around and asked me what I was looking at. What are YOU looking at?"

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Patrick is gay

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What do you call a group of black gentle men running down a hill A group of black gentle men running down a hill

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Why was Lucile crying? Because she was sad.

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What's worse than 20 babies stapled to one tree? Getting life imprisonment after...

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Why doesn't Santa Claus like cantaloupe? Because he doesn't exist. You have to exist to like cantaloupe.

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Why did the plane crash? The pilot was a bagel.

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What has four legs, its yellow with black spots, and can run as fast as a Cheetah? Another Cheetah

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How do you make a mail man cry? Run him over with a forklift.

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What did Gene give Carla for Christmas? AIDS

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The pennis has a tuff life, his best friend is a pussy, his neighbors is an A hole, his family is nuts, and his master beats him.

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Yo mama is so fat, that she recieves an allowance due to being physically disabled.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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