guess what Beethoven is doing right now. de-composing

Q:whats the easiest way to get crabs? A:at your local seafood market.

How do you torture Helen Keller? Leave the plunger in her toilet with the handle greased.

What did Sam say when the basketball hit her face? Ouch.

How do you get a movie star to go out with you? Blackmail.

Wanna hear a joke? No.

There once was a man from Peru Whose limericks stopped at line two (I sense the public demanding an encore) There once was a man from Verdun There's also a limerick about Emperor Nero, but I can't tell it to you.

A black policeman and a white policeman work different shifts, one is during the day and one is at night and the both get equal pay.

???????????????????????????? ????????????????????????????? ????????????????????????????? ????????????????????????????? ????????????????????????????? ????????????????????????????? ????????????????????????????? ????????????????????????????? ????????????????????????????? ????????????????????????????? ????????????????????????????? ????????????????????????????? ????????????????????????????? ????????????????????????????? ????????????????????????????? ????????????????????????????? ????????????????????????????? ????????????????????????????? ????????????????????????????? ????????????????????????????? ????????????????????????????? ????????????????????????????? I cant make a good joke.

Knock Knock. Who's there? UPS.

hi

2 blonds are driving on the road on their way to Disney Land. They come to the sign that says Disney Land left so they started crying, turned around and went home.

Rebbeca black walked into a bar on Saturday

Do you know any good bird jokes? Well this is hawkward...

How do you get a baby to stop crying You kill it

why does everyone hate chris. cause he's a douchebag.

what is fat and ugly. fat and ugly people

The chicken came before the egg. Because eggs are an unborn chicken, and it is impossible for an unborn chicken to ejaculate.

What did Helen Keller's parents do to punish her? They gave her a stern talking to and then grounded her for a couple days.

What did the cancer patient say to the arab? the tumors hurt my body

Your argument is invalid, but I will allow you your opinion nonetheless.

Knock, Knock! Who's there? Matt. Matt, who? You're friend Matt that you texted twenty minutes ago telling me to come over.

Yo' mama so stupid, she has a lower IQ than the average person.

What did Billy get his parents for Christmas? Billy's an orphan.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

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The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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