LOL i just pissed on Hitlers grave! Shoudn't killed the Jews BITCH!

What did Niel Patrick Harris do after coming out of the closet? He grabbed his jacket and went for a delightful stroll in the park.

What makes the turtle move? It's legs.

Why doesn't stevie wonder play snooker? Because it's not very popular in the US.

So there was a pirate, he got shot in the back. And when he got shot he turned to his freind (fellow pirate) and said i have been shot and there is a pretty good chance i will die.

how do you fit 100 jews in a car? 2 in the front seat, 3 in the back seat, and 95 in the ash tray.

"hey those pancakes look pretty good." "thats a cat steve."

What did the husband tell his obese wife? I love you honey

My dog has no nose, so how does it smell? It can't, I just told you it has no nose.

i am a duck. are you a duck. yes i am a duck.

You say you can read me like a book, well the jokes on you. I am not a book.

Why did Helen Kellers dog run away? You would too if your name was Hjshdvcyehbretafvvba.

What did the bubble do to the wall? Nothing it is a Bubble.

Why did the man go to the restaurant? Because he wanted to get some food.

Q: What did the Goth-Punk girl write on her test for the question "What are three kinds of rock?" A: Igneous, Sedimentary, & Metamorphic, She is a 4.0 Geology Major attending a respectable University. She simply chooses to express herself through the musical and clothing trends that emerged in 1970's English underground music. In reality it her personal preferences in the aforementioned areas have no bearing on her intellectual or academic standing.

Why was the little kid bullied? Because his name was Hugh Jass.

Wanna hear a joke? No.

Why did the chicken cross the road? To mourn the loss of his daughter who died due a fatal car crash, caused by him while he was driving. across the street

A mute says to a paraplegic: You can talk the talk - but can you walk the walk?

Why did Rose throw the clock out the window? Because she's a moron.

What did Bill go for his birthday? No where someone slashed his tires.

What is a bear's favorite televison show? It doesnt have one because it is a bear which makes watching television an illogical fallacy.

What did the apple tree say to the farmer? Well! since trees nor apples have the ability to talk I would say the apple tree said nothing. And if the farmer thinks it did say something he should visit the doctors to check his hearing. The End.

Q: What happens when you throw a green rock in the Red Sea? A: It gets wet.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...