Why was my teacher depressed? Because she wanted to live in her pasta

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Roses are brown. Violets are brown. It's the middle of winter. Flowers look like poop.

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When life gives you lemons, make a lemon and tamarind chutney.

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Why is the grass always greener on the other side? because they have a landscaper.

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Why did the black homeowner default on his house? He was paying significantly more in mortgage than the actual market value of the home, since he purchased his property before the housing bubble. He carried out a cost/benefit analysis and derived the conclusion that he was effectively destroying his own wealth by paying his mortgage bills.

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What do you say to jacks mum when your having Sex? Nothing she's dead.

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Konock Konock Uh, you spelt knock knock wrong... Oh.

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I like my coffee like I like my women Without a penis

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What's the similarity between a grape and an elephant? Both are purple except for the elephant.

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How many Jews does it take to screw in a lightbulb. Two. But it would have to be a very big lightbulb to fit both of them in there.

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whats gay ? you

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How do you get four gay guys on a bar stool? With teamwork and coordination, each could place one foot on the seat, and they can all stand up using each other for balance and support. The fact that they are gay in unimportant.

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What is as ugly as Justin Bieber's face? Justin Bieber's face.

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A black and a mexican start a resturaunt it turns out to be a big success and they make a chain and profit from it.

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What do you get when you combine High Fructose corn syrup. sunflower oil, carbohydrates, and water. How the heck should I know!

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A horse walks into a bar, Bartender says why the long face? and the horse says, i have horse aids

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The economy sucks. REM broke up. A man killed himself.

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Knock Knock Who's there? Father Dougal Mcguire

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What's worst then lose 100$ Lose 101$

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Yo mama is so fat, that she recieves an allowance due to being physically disabled.

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Mitt Romney for president.

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What do you call two homosexuals in fancy hats? It depends, you have to ask their names first.

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Yo mama's so stupid, I told her it was chili outside so she went outside with a spoon.

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Why did Sally fall off the swing? She had no arms. Knock knock. Whos there? NOT SALLY.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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