Roses are grey Violets are grey I am a dog.

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What happened to the orphan on Christmas? he got raped

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What happened to the guy who ate an alarm clock at six o' clock in the morning? He puked a lot, and was diagnosed with a horrible digestive disorder.

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I'm so hungry, I could eat an adequately sized meal

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How can you tell that a blonde has been using a computer? You can't. There's no common link between computing habits and hair color.

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Why did the black man win the staring contest? He's good at staring

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Why did jack fall down the hill ? Because Jill pushed him.

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Why did the little boy cry? His entire family was shot and killed at his elementary school play.

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Why did the black guy go to jail, because he did illegal stuff.

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why did the chicken cross the road? it wanted to get the waffle ice cream cone that was on the ground next to the little child who got hit by a bus.

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How many pumpkins can you fit in a watch? Depends how much jelly is in the pumpkins

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Knock knock Who's there? What.

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How do you find a needle in a haystack? You don't, you're too distracted by the pile of adorable kittens next to it

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A young couple just gave birth to their first child and the doctor says, "I’ve good some good news and some bad news, what do you want first?" "Give us the bad news first", the parents reply. "Your baby has red hair", says the doctor. "Well whats the good news", ask the parents. "It’s dead", says the doctor.

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What's funny about a Jew, a Muslim, and a Christian going over the edge of a bridge in the same car? Nothing, they all died

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What did Billy get his parents for Christmas? Billy's an orphan.

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How did the fat man die? Clogged arteries leading to a heart attack.

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Why couldn't the 14 year old find a date? Because he had a speech impediment and girls avoided him usually.

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A black man and a Mexican are hired as day laborers by a white man. The black man cleans the house while the Mexican mows and trims the yard. Both are hard-working and attempting to provide for their families in a down economy.

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-How do you pull a prank on Helen Keller? -Stick a plunger in the toilet!

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Why did Sarah fall off the swing? She didn't have any arms. Knock knock. Who's there? Not Sarah.

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Why was my teacher depressed? Because she wanted to live in her pasta

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memes

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Whats worst than being attacked by a tiger? Being attacked by 2 tigers.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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