"Knock knock" "Who's there?" "Your landlord, clear out your stuff by tuesday"

thumb_up thumb_down +36

What's the deal with airline food? It's nourishing matter that sustains life, provides energy, and promotes growth distributed by flight attendants.

thumb_up thumb_down +36

How did the fat man die? Clogged arteries leading to a heart attack.

thumb_up thumb_down +34

What did the mushroom say to the pretty lady? Nothing, because it's a mushroom.

thumb_up thumb_down +34

yo mama is so fat, she should seriously consider gastric bypass surgery, morbid obesity is extremely detrimental to one's health

thumb_up thumb_down +34

womens rights!

thumb_up thumb_down +34

How do you have sex with an amputee? stick it in the eyes

thumb_up thumb_down +32

A squirrel got killed by getting hit by a truck haha its funny cuz the squirrel died

thumb_up thumb_down +32

How do you know when there's a terrorist in an airport? There's a camel in the parking lot.

thumb_up thumb_down +32

What did the black man say to the other black man? Nothing, he was recently involved in a terrible car accident which he barely survived but lost the function of speech and was paralysed from the neck downwards. He is constantly in pain and desperately wants someone to kill him but has no way of communicating this so is forced to wait until his natural death.

thumb_up thumb_down +32

Yo mommas so stupid, she got raped.

thumb_up thumb_down +32

What's worse than getting stuck in traffic? AIDS.

thumb_up thumb_down +30

What happened to the dying kangaroo? He died What animal is not in the lion king? Kangaroo --why? Because he died...

thumb_up thumb_down +30

here's a great way to ruin someone's 'knock knock' joke: Knock knock Come in!

thumb_up thumb_down +30

What did the monkey say to the garbage collector? Eiiiiijajajaajaja EIIIIJAAA

thumb_up thumb_down +30

Your mom is so fat, when she sat on a lump of coal she didn't realize she sat on a lump of coal.

thumb_up thumb_down +30

A man with a ski mask on enters a bank, he just came back from the slopes.

thumb_up thumb_down +28

What do you call a disabled Jew? His name

thumb_up thumb_down +28

2 gingers went to a pumpkin patch... And nobody ever found them( life lesson, don't take your ginger to a pumpkin patch)

thumb_up thumb_down +28

What do you call a fat legless over weight black man called Tom. Tom.

thumb_up thumb_down +26

How do you make a plumber cry? Kill his family

thumb_up thumb_down +26

What do a baker and gynecologist have in common? They can smell it, but they can't eat it.

thumb_up thumb_down +26

Why is the grass always greener on the other side? because they have a landscaper.

thumb_up thumb_down +26

The awkward moment when you notice its 2012 and we're all gonna die, so you buy and elephant and name him John.

thumb_up thumb_down +26

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops