What's your middle name? (Interrupt them) It doesn't matter what your middle name is! What does deduce mean? Fall down the stairs.

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When life gives you lemons, make lemonade.

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When practicing the art of origami and the berrilium dialates, how many quince pies does it take to calculate a tree? Tricycle

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ring ring young man: dad? mom's dead? woman: i think you dialed the wrong number young man: .......oh im sorry, you're absolutely right, silly me! woman: don't worry about it. young man: (chuckles) click

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Q: Why did the paraplegic go to the gym? A: to watch his friend work out

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A horse walks into a bar. It neighs and knocks over a few tables before leaving the bar confused.

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Mexicans working in an office

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Knock Knock? Who's There? The Gestapo.

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What's worse than a baby in a car accident? The baby survives and has a mental problem, grows up, and then drives the same car and gets in another accident.

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Womens rights.

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A man sees the doctor. "Doctor, if I hit myself on my head, it hurts, if I hit myself on my arm, it hurts, and if I hit myself on my leg, it hurts as well." "The case is clear. You need to f*ing stop hitting yourself!"

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Boy: Doctor! Doctor! I can't see my arm! Doctor: It's because your blind son

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how does a zookeeper build a snowman. same as everyone else

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Q. What do you call a black priest? A. Holy Shit

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Your moms so fat, she's not skinny

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What does Obama and Darth Vader Have in Common? Nothing. Darth Vader is not a real person and thus cannot be compared to the president of the UNited States.

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Why is 6 afraid of 7? Because 7,8,9! (Also it killed his family and nuked his country too)

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How many elephants can you fit in a car? Five. Two in the front, two in the back, and one in the glove compartment.

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how do you get a chicken to sleep you slit it"s neck,and feed the body to your pet tiger

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Why did OJ SImpson never get convicted of murder? Because after going to court and proving his innocence a jury of twelve people found him not guilty.

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alright whoever posted it, like this, then comment your first name

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When Jesus came back from the dead the first thing he said was "It was just a prank bro!"

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Im gonna Rape that Liberato kid you was talking about, ALL UP THE ASS i will find him.

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The doctor said he had good news and bad news. I asked for the bad news first. He said, "You have AIDS. I asked what the good news was. He said "You will only have it about a year."

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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