why did the bird fall out of the tree? Earth's Gravitational pull

An Englishman, Irishman and Scotsman walk into a bar. It happens frequently at UK airports.

why did the monkey fall out of the tree? because it was dead.

whats worse then finding out your girlfriend cheated on you.. -9/11

The real Justin Beiber reallly followed me on twitter I deleted my account, set my computer on fire, scattered the ashes and killed myself

Scenario: 2 guys with big feet and a camels Anus are hiking on Mount Everest with a set of elephants dildos Man 1: what's the difference between a Volkswagen and a clock? Man 2: what? Man 1: you can't toboggan of a green house roof with a tub of Vaseline and a ostrich party on lady gaga's Anus

what do you call a duck with no legs? a sitting duck

So this is an anti-joke website, right?

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What do you get when you cross a lion with a rhinoceros? A trip to the hospital and animal cruelty charges.

I went to the doctors the other day for a check up and the doctors says to me "sorry your going to have to stop wanking" and I say to him " what! Why?" and the doctor says "I'm trying to examine you".

So I'm balls deep in this turkey dinner....... then i proceed to ejaculate into it and ruin my family's Thanksgiving along with their perception of me.

Q:Waht did the blind deaf kid get for chrismas? A: Cancer

Why did the old lady but her Jelly In her roller skates and dress them up like a doll? She has Dementia

Why was the little boy sad? Because a stranger stole his shirt.

I heard you let the cat out of the bag. It died.

Two Jewish Rabbis are sitting in a sandbox....

What's the opposite of Them Cox? Deez Nuts

knock knock hows there sorry but i was to lazy to think of an ending

Why did the Jew ask for a napkin? something funny about the holocaust

Your momma's so fat she has fat rolls on her stomach.

What did the homeless guy do when he saw a bucket? He peed in it

Is your refrigerator running? Yes. Good. The food I placed in the refrigerator a few hours ago will now be cold.

How did Notre Dame football stay so popular in spite of decades of mediocrity? Catholicism.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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