What did the man say when he dropped an apple on his foot? That might have caused some minor discomfort had I not been wearing shoes.

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R2-D2 is quite possibly the most vulgar character on the set of Star Wars. Every word he says is bleeped out.

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What's the difference between black people and dog shit? One of them eventually turns white and stops smelling.

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How do you beat someone in a video game? You win it.

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What did the Queen of England say when here servant died? Another one bites the dust!

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Once upon a time, You have a nice rack...

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What do you give a Penn State waterboy for Halloween - Candy

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why was the asian kid found dead? he failed an examen

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What does D.N.A. stand for? Deoxyribonucleic Acid

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You know what helps with sholder pain? If you lick my butthole.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? The undeveloped cerebral cortex vital for comprehending irony left the chicken incapable of finding humor or possibly feeling self-disgust in the acknowledgment that it had just wandered across said road, this being a grandfathered human jest.

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roses are red, violets are blue, I have schizophrenia, which is a serious mental disorder in which I have difficulty properly experiencing reality. It should not be confused with multiple personality disorder, which is a completely different disease with different symptoms.

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Dumbledore: Yo mamma's so fat --- her Patronus is a cake! Voldemort: ...bitch!

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What did Jesus say to the Easter Rabbit? Nothing, it ran off before he could say anything. They're so skiddish, those pesky rabbits...

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Brittney Spears

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Why did the blonde cross the road? Because she was stupid.

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Where did Sally go during the bombing? Everywhere

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What's worse then biting into an apple and finding a worm? Finding half a worm and wondering where the other half is. o.O

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Knock knock, Knock knock jokes aren't funny.

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WNBA

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Knock knock! Who's there? Dick! Dick who? Dick Stewart, your neighbor from next door!

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Morgan Freeman walks into a bar. Everyone is pleasantly surprised they are in the presence of a celebrity.

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What's the difference between your mom and a table? The table isn't a whore.

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Why was the man running from the cops? His car broke down.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops