Two peanuts were walking down the street and one was asalted

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96

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why was the little girl crying? because she was molested

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A man waltzes into a bar, waving a carrot in the air. With an arrogant air of self-importance he flops onto a highchair at the bar. Looka here, looka here, he says to the bartender, waiving the carrot at the man. Will you buy me drinks all night, if I can make this carrot... Never mind, and please leave my bar, the bartender says, pulling out a carrot from under the counter. I've got one myself.

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Chaney is a dumb b****

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was dead. Why did the other monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was stapled to the first. Why did the third monkey fall out of the tree? Because he thought it was a game.

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what's faster than a jet? a speeding bullet. what's faster than a speeding bullet? light.

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Q. What gets louder as it gets smaller? A. A baby in a paper shredder

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chuck norris's tears cure cancer, to bad chuck norris never cries

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josh- your a strange boy. liam- yes. due to by up bringing i have been exposed to unusual situations that most people do not encounter therefore affecting how i behave. Secondly the definition of normal is varying from person to person making being normal to every human being difficult to even the most capable of people. Essentialy Josh i care little for you comment. *josh was a black man who died of cancer 6 weeks after this incodent*

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Two horses, a man with a tall bun, three lesbians, an African woman and another man wearing a clown suit come up to you in your work outfit and shriek:"Happy Casual Friday!" Okay, so maybe this went too far.

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Did you know?

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Why did Tyrone attack? Because he was getting made fun of

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Q: How did the blonde commit suicide? A: She shot herself in the head.

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Akshaytiger World

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-What's the difference between a frog? - it jumps higher.

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Fish for a man, he has food for tonight. Teach a man how to fish and he will have one more skill under his belt.

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Where do cows go on the weekend? The slaughterhouse.

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Roses are grey Violets are grey I'm a dog.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? I dunno, that's why I asked you.

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What does Obama and Darth Vader Have in Common? Nothing. Darth Vader is not a real person and thus cannot be compared to the president of the UNited States.

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Your mom is so fat she has to buy clothes at a Plus-size clothing store.

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Rock mattress.

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Why do Kenyans run so much? Because they like it.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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