- Anti Joke

How did Notre Dame football stay so popular in spite of decades of mediocrity? Catholicism.

What do u call a gay guy with a long dik Dickgimme a lick

What's the difference between The Holocaust and baking pizza? Pizza doesn't scream in the oven.

Two strangers are sitting at a bar having a drink. One is a young, fat, red-headed guy named Fred. The other is an elderly grey-haired man. After a while, Fred turns to the old man and awkwardly asks: "Excuse me sir would ya' mind givin me some advice? There's this girl who has sat next to me on the bus every morning for the past three months. She's the most beautiful woman I have ever seen. She always smiles and winks at me. I wannna ask her on a date but every time I go to do it I freeze. I just don't know what to say. I'm sorry to bother you, but I'm falling for this girl and I don't know what in the world to do. Any tips?" The old man continues to sit quietly, slowly sipping his drink. After a while the old man looks at Fred. "Hmmm" says the old man, as he thinks over Fred's question. "What is your name son?" He asks Fred. "It's Fred sir," replies Fred. "Hmmm," the old man says again as he continues to think over Fred's question. The old man then stands up, takes out a gun, and shoots Fred in the face. Fred never saw it coming.

What time is it? 12:03 AM

Why did Harry go to the store? He was out of food.

What do you call a man bathing with a toaster Electrocuted

Why did the alien cross the road. To get to his ship.

Did you hear about the guy with seven fingers? You should, because almost everybody has seven fingers.

What is worse than getting a paper cut? Your whole family dying to MERS in Peru before you were old enough to remember any of them.

What did the fat man get for his birthday? diabetes

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How many doctors does it take to screw in a light-bulb? One, usually.

yo momma is so tall shes tall

What do u get when you mix a young asian woman and a black man? Tiger Woods

Whats red and smells like blue paint? A blue waffle.

What does the black guy say to his black friend? "I like Watermelon, Grape Drink, and Fried Chicken.

Anal cheese curds.

A horse walks into a bar. The bartender says, "Why the long face?", laughs at his own joke, then calls animal control.

your momma is so old, she has heart problems

a drug dealer was caught and sent to jail. he asks the cop if he could give the cop the drugs for bail. the cop does not except the offer because it is against the law.

how does a zookeeper build a snowman. same as everyone else

What band protects hope in current music? Nickelback.

What Mary short for? Due to the fact she has no legs, on account of the flesh eating she contracted after a visit to argentina thanks to the make-a-wish foundation. Mary also has cancer

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

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NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK! Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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