Pirate ships are used by pirates.

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I hate being bipolar, it's so awesome.

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How do you kill a blonde? lightsabre to the throat should do it

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Osama Bin Laden dies.

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What did batman say to the Joker? I'm Batman

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Two Jewish men walk into a butcher shop. They don't buy any pork because that is a fundamental dietary restriction placed upon by their religion.

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why is my brother white and i am brown? the milk man is very fast!

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Two hunters are out in the woods when one of them collapses. He doesn't seem to be breathing and his eyes are glazed. The other guy whips out his phone and calls the emergency services. He gasps, "My friend is dead! What can I do?". The operator says "Calm down. I can help. First, let's make sure he's dead." There is a silence, then the man said "he has a pulse". The operator then calmly stated "we are sending a helicopter to air lift him out of there as we speak". The man got helicoptered to the nearest ER, and the doctors did their best to save him. He ended up having to go on life support for three years until his family members finally decided to pull the plug. The medical insurance didn't cover life support and the family went broke because of it.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Various reasons, one of which was to visit his wife in hospital where she was suffering from a sever case of depression. The other reason was to say his last words to her as she also has lung cancer.

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Roses are grey, violets are grey, im a dog

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Why did the indian man take the peanuts out of his lunch? Because he's allergic.

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I went to the doctors the other day for a check up and the doctors says to me "sorry your going to have to stop wanking" and I say to him " what! Why?" and the doctor says "I'm trying to examine you".

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So this is an anti-joke website, right?

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-Hey, Larry! How much is one plus one? -Two

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whats 2+2? 69 LOL

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Peas and Corn. Porn., a deer

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little travis puts hedgehogs in his poop chute

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How did the Jews get out of Germany? They didn't..

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What's the difference between The Holocaust and baking pizza? Pizza doesn't scream in the oven.

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what is brown and rhymes with snoop? dr dre

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I used to be a schizophrenic but we're okay now

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No

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why did oprah, your mother, and a monkey on a rock have in common? the ability to fornicate

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What olympic event is Kosovo best known for getting gold? Kosovo is the world's newest country and therefore does not yet have complete international recognition.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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