What do you cal a thousand black people swimming to Africa with a Jew under each arm? Waterboarding.

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Did you hear the one about the man who went into the jungle wearing nothing but leopard print underwear? He was suffering from psychogenic fugue disorder and had no idea who or where he was. He was eventually eaten alive by a flesh-eating centipede. When his wife found out, she committed suicide.

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Wanna hear a joke? Me too.

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What's the difference between a Jew and a pizza? You shouldn't eat Jews, unless your a cannibal for which you should seek psychological help.

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a priest a rabbi and a minister all walk into a bar and the bartender says "is this a joke?"

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I walked in on my daughter masturbating. The whole ordeal was very uncomfortable, but I sat her down at the dining table to discreetly explain the necessity of locking doors.

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What did the boy with cancer get for christmas? -A haircut

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Women's rights.

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When I was at the beach digging in the sand I looked down and someone said nehow

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Hey you want to hear a joke? Oh well. Goodbye

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Someone told me about this website.

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What did the carrot say when he was Chopped. Auch.

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A feminist walked into a bar and had her period

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what happened to the chicken that crossed the road? it got hit by a taco truck

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Jews for Jesus

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How can you confuse a blonde? Give her a calculus worksheet that she hasn't learned how to do.

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What do you call a mouse that sings? Justin Bieber

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That's a lie, buffaloes are extinct now

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cut it out ..but i dont have a scissor

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Avery has crabs.

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Why did the japanese bomb pearl harbor? they wanted to weaken the US naval fleet to stop the US embargo on oil being shipped to japan

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Knock knock! Who's there? Dick! Dick who? Dick Stewart, your neighbor from next door!

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Two hunters are out in the woods when one of them collapses. He doesn't seem to be breathing and his eyes are glazed. The other guy whips out his phone and calls the emergency services. He gasps, "My friend is dead! What can I do?". The operator says "Calm down. I can help. First, let's make sure he's dead." There is a silence, then the man said "he has a pulse". The operator then calmly stated "we are sending a helicopter to air lift him out of there as we speak". The man got helicoptered to the nearest ER, and the doctors did their best to save him. He ended up having to go on life support for three years until his family members finally decided to pull the plug. The medical insurance didn't cover life support and the family went broke because of it.

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Your momma is so boss that I work for her.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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