Why was the girl crying? She got kicked in the vagina

thumb_up thumb_down +10

What's worse than the Holocaust? Finding a worm in your apple.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

an invisible man walks into a bar and asks for a drink. No one noticed him cause hes invisible

thumb_up thumb_down +10

what happened to the chicken that crossed the road? it got hit by a taco truck

thumb_up thumb_down +10

*via text message* Me: Hey Trevor! You at home? Trevor: This is Trevor's mom. Trevor committed suicide today.. Me: OMG! Why?!? Trevor: Because when I gave him a glass of water, it had 3 ice cubes. Trevor doesn't like odd numbers.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

pubic lice.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

How do you make an antijoke corny. How? Corn.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Q: Why is the sun so bright? A: Because it reads books!

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Person 1: It's your birthday? Person 2: Yeah! Person 1: Oh.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Why did the japanese bomb pearl harbor? they wanted to weaken the US naval fleet to stop the US embargo on oil being shipped to japan

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Why did the man jump off of the cliff? Because he was suicidal.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

whats brown and black and sits in a tree...... a bird

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Roses are grey, violets are grey, im a dog

thumb_up thumb_down +6

How are a plum and a rabbit alike? Theyre both purple except for the rabbit.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

What do you call a black person who flys a plane? Well, first ask for their name, then address them as such.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

What do you call a kid with no arms, no legs, and an eye patch? Names

thumb_up thumb_down +6

What is red and invisible? No tomatoes.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

What's (333x4)-198+(456x100,432)-10+5? Bet ya said i don't know! I don't either.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

Why did the jew break his iPhone? He dropped it when i shot him in the face.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

So I'm balls deep in this turkey dinner....... then i proceed to ejaculate into it and ruin my family's Thanksgiving along with their perception of me.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

How many Aodhan's does it take to screw in a lightbulb? Aodhan's da has already screwed all the lightbulbs...

thumb_up thumb_down +4

Dont be silly, you know that everything is relative, and that relativity is as unlimited as the subconscious mind, give me ten more minutes, and I can hypnotize you in five minutes in order to see life in slow motion yourself for as long as you feel like. Just dont expect your body to adjust like mine, meaning that if you try to run, your brain will use its old habits while your perception is used to the slow ones... In other words, you will end up on the floor or smacking into a wall.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

No.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

-What's a real anti joke? -This.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops