What do you call a bus full of lawyers at the bottom of the ocean? A tragedy

Your mama is so stupid she had to go back to school to get her GED in order to get a job that could properly support her family.

cot!

why did the 14 year old girl cross the road? to get an abortion of the child she became impregnated with after getting raped.

Poopsack Jones

Why did the man jump off of the cliff? Because he was suicidal.

I just made up a joke! How many women does it take to screw in a light bulb? Seven. The ending needs some work...

Why did the Koala fall out of the tree? Cause it was dead. Why did the second Koala fall off the tree? Cause it was also dead. Why did the third Koala fall off the tree? It thought the other two were playing a game. Why did the motorcyclist end up in the hospital? He was attacked by falling Koalas!

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How many jews does it take to change a light bulb? over 100

Knock Knock. Whos there? Satan.

Why did the japanese bomb pearl harbor? they wanted to weaken the US naval fleet to stop the US embargo on oil being shipped to japan

Q: What Did Batman Say To Robin When They Got In The Car? A: Get In The Car

what do rappers cover? ->CANDY CREDITS: ANUJ NARAYAN VARMA from Leland high school

What's black and white, and red all over? newspaper...

Whats gets stiff when you have sex with it? A dead body.

Why did the woman make a sandwich? She was hungry

Three men are stranded, mid-ocean, in a small rowboat. They realize quickly that their imminent demise is slowly creeping into the forefront of their consciousnesses. Just as all hope seem to be lost, one man noticed an island covered in luscious foliage about five hundred yards away. A problem reared it's head as it became apparent that an unrelenting riptide was dragging the boat further and further from the shore and, in turn, salvation. It became further apparent that the men would have to abandon their rickety rowboat and swim the rest of the way. The first man bravely jumps into the vast uncertainty of the ocean and attempts to swim to shore. He is met by a large shark that promptly severs his arm from his body. A bloody mess, he manages to touch down on the sandy beach. The second man, more reluctantly, also jumps in. He balanced his chances: "100% death in the boat vs. uncertainty in the ocean." Like the first man, the second man meets the shark's vicious bite. His leg is severed and he too drags himself, bloody, to the warm embrace of sand and freedom. The third man, sure that he would be bitten also, jumps into the ocean and swims to shore. Alas! The third man arrived on the island unscathed and completely fine. Perplexed, the first two men asked the third why the shark did not attack him. The third man simply smiled and replied..."what do you expect me for, a typewriter?"

corey is a nipplepotomus

What would we do with out women? Die and then become extinct

How do you make a napkin dance? You can't. Stop having such unrealistic aspirations.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Various reasons, one of which was to visit his wife in hospital where she was suffering from a sever case of depression. The other reason was to say his last words to her as she also has lung cancer.

Why did the plumber kill his family? He wasn't a very good plumber.

Roses are red. Violets are blue. I have Alzheimer's. Where are the keys?

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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