Roses are red. Voilets are blue I'm Morgan Freeman and I CAN SMELL YOU...

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What's black, over twelve inches long, and has a hard time fitting in tight spaces? my double stroller.

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How do you fit 100 charizards into a bus? Put them into pokeballs. Otherwise, there would be no possible way because Charizards are such large creatures.

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9/11

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Boobs are nasty!

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i felt like burning some calories so i lit a fat kid on fire

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Your momma's so fat that when she uses a hoolahoop, she gets tired after one try and has to stop.

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alright whoever posted it, like this, then comment your first name

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How do you kill a blue elephant? How? With a blue elephant gun. How do you kill a pink elephant? How? You hold it's nose until it turns blue, then you shoot it with a blue elephant gun. How do you kill a orange elephant? How? You can't, they don't exist. How do you kill a white elephant? How? You tickle it till it turns pink, then you hold it's noose until it turns blue, then you shoot it with a blue elephant gun.

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What did Niel Patrick Harris do after coming out of the closet? He grabbed his jacket and went for a delightful stroll in the park.

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How many ADD kids dose it take to screw in a light bulb? one; the attention deficit disorder dose not take away the ability too screw in a light bulb.

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How do you realize your life is over? You don't, but the coroner does.

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Roses are red, Violets are blueish, Without Hitler, We'd all be Jewish.

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dumbledore says,"today we will learn new spells,any questions?" a student says,"are you serious?" dumbledore says,"no he is in jail for a crime he didn't commit,sort of like the a-team."

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Patiant: Doctor Doctor i feel like a pair of curtains Doctor: ok Patiant: what shall i do ? Doctor: Go how and stop wasting my time

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Who can jump higher than a mountain? Everyone, mountains are incapapable of jumping.

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What did you say? I don't know.

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Q:What did the policemen say to the other policemen? A:Safe

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How does a black man make an anti joke? www.anti-joke.com/submit

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boobs

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Finding two worms in your apple.

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A black man walks into a predominantly white bar and is laughed at hysterically, the man is a world class comedian.

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Why did Dave not hug his wife? Because she looked horrifying from the Iraq war.

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What did Helen Keller's parents do to punish her? They gave her a stern talking to and then grounded her for a couple days.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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