You are the weakest link. Goodbye.

Can I touch it?

Why didnt the kid go in the pool? Because there was no pool!!

Q. How did Kit Kat candy bars get their name? A. It was chosen by manufacturer.

why did the 14 year old girl cross the road? to get an abortion of the child she became impregnated with after getting raped.

What did the carrot say when he was Chopped. Auch.

Why did the chicken cross the road? -I don't care

why can't Helen Keller drive? because she's a women

What's a mexican's favorite sport? It varies from person to person.

Why did the boy cross the road? Because he was on his way to a friends house, after being kicked out yet again because his parents are homophobes and can't come to terms with his sexual preferences. When he got there, his friend was already asleep and he had to sleep in the gutter. He then got a cold and died because his immune system had been weakened by aids. His parents still didn't accept him, and didn't go to his funeral.

what a tomato would say if his friend would be hit by a car? Nothing because tomatoes can't speak

Hollywood presents: "HELP US MARIO! THE WORLD IS BEING OVERWHELMED BY KOOPA AND HIS FORCES OF TURTLES!" "What the hell do you want me to do? I am a damn plumber, squish them? Besides they are just turtles" "Oh yeah..." Steven Spielberg: Get bay on this script, at least its much better than the first one.

WNBA

a man walks into a bar..... the man pulls out a gun and robs the place as he is exiting he bumps into a child the child falls in the street and is crushed by a bus. the bus in an attempt to avoid the child swerves and hits a maternity clinic next to a gas station that promptly explodes. the robber so distraught he trys to shoot himself but the gun misfired and the man was arrested and was raped repeatedly in prison...he now has aids...

Why do horses read books? We are all doomed...

Knock Knock! Who's There? Not Steve Jobs.

Like this joke

How do you make a blond cry? Rape her

What's the difference between your mom and a table? The table isn't a whore.

What do you call a black person trying to swim? Wet.

how do you say desk in spanish? escritorio

What do you call a chicken with its head cut off? A dead chicken. Most likely ready to be cooked/eaten

what did the joke say to the anti-joke? do you want to fight

whats the difference between a blonde and a brunette? A. Genetics.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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