Whats funnier than an anti joke? a real one.

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Why did the man buy a rope? Because he needed a noose

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What do Ed Milliband and David Milliband have in common? They are brothers.

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what did the nazi say to the jew? hi

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What does the black guy say to his black friend? "I like Watermelon, Grape Drink, and Fried Chicken.

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? It was dead.

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The man from Poland was so dumb he was eligible to live in a supervised group home.

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what do you call a black person in a electronic store? a customer

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i fondle myself every night....

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who farted? umm........that guy.

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What's purple and green and has a criminal record including two counts of armed robbery, five counts of possession with intent to sell, one count of attempted murder, several citations for underage drinking, and a parking ticket? Barney, but ignore all that other stuff. His record was expunged.

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what do you call a dear with no I? No I dear

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A man runs into a psychiatrist's office and screams, "You gotta help me doc! I just killed seven people in my office building!"

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A man sees the doctor. "Doctor, if I hit myself on my head, it hurts, if I hit myself on my arm, it hurts, and if I hit myself on my leg, it hurts as well." "The case is clear. You need to f*ing stop hitting yourself!"

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A man comes home from the office, walks inside and hangs up his coat and hat at the door. He walks into the kitchen to find his wife has not made dinner instead she is drinking with friends, she tells him that she would have made dinner but she didnt want to. Furious, the man storms to the door, grabs his coat and leaves... He gets in his car and drives down to the pub. Sitting there drinking his beer, trying to calm down he finds a peice of paper tucked into his coat pocket, he unfolds it and reads it. It turns out to be a memo he wrote to remind himself at work that day.

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a drug dealer was caught and sent to jail. he asks the cop if he could give the cop the drugs for bail. the cop does not except the offer because it is against the law.

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BUTTERFARTING

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What does Pontiac stand for - People Of Normal Thinking Intelligence Acting Classy

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Why did the guy kill his friends? He didn't, he doesn't have any friends

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What do you call someone that hates gay people? An asshole.

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What did Mambo say to Jumbo? Nothing. Because they weren't friends.

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When Jesus came back from the dead the first thing he said was "It was just a prank bro!"

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How did Little Jimmie leave school? In a body bag.

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1+1=3 If you don't use a condom.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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