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Your mama is so stupid she had to go back to school to get her GED in order to get a job that could properly support her family.

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ron:jim i cant get the toaster to work jim:dude thats a thats my car!

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What do you cal a thousand black people swimming to Africa with a Jew under each arm? Waterboarding.

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Boy: BRB Girl: OK. *Two hours later* Boy: Back. Girl: What took you so long? Boy: Someone asked why I loved you. Girl: Aw, that's so s- Boy: I know! I had no idea who he was! I had to call the cops.

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Communism

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Hollywood presents: "HELP US MARIO! THE WORLD IS BEING OVERWHELMED BY KOOPA AND HIS FORCES OF TURTLES!" "What the hell do you want me to do? I am a damn plumber, squish them? Besides they are just turtles" "Oh yeah..." Steven Spielberg: Get bay on this script, at least its much better than the first one.

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What do you get a black guy when he is hungry? Something edible.

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Doctor, Doctor I keep getting pains in the eye when I drink coffee! It's not the coffee, you have a deadly case of ocular melanoma, a form of cancer that affects the eye. You'll be blind within the next 24 hours.

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I pissed myself the other day in Harrods when I saw a Somalian boy run up to a curtain saying mummy.

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An asian walks out of math class

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An octopus walks into a bar. The people in the bar, realizing the potential of danger, stand up and leave the bar quietly.

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"did you hear about the midget's self-murder?" "No, what happend?" "He jumped off the curb"

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How do you get your wife to stop nagging? chop off her head

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Rebecca Black was taking a leisurely stroll on a Friday afternoon. She was consumed by a lion.

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why did the old woman die? Because she was too old to live

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What do u call a black pope? A poooooopppp!

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an invisible man walks into a bar and asks for a drink. No one noticed him cause hes invisible

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everyone's always talking about the emperor's clothes, don't they know this is murica

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Why did the japanese bomb pearl harbor? they wanted to weaken the US naval fleet to stop the US embargo on oil being shipped to japan

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what do rappers cover? ->CANDY CREDITS: ANUJ NARAYAN VARMA from Leland high school

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What is the difference between a black man and a bike? Bikes are not human beings and therefore cannot experience the ups and downs a human being experiences.

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Two friends not to far apart: A: Hey you, you hear me?! B: yes. A: You hear me?! B: yes!! A: You hear me?! B: yes, yes, what!?! A: You hear me?! B: YEEEEEEEES WHAT'S going on?!?! (gets upset) A: Nothing, I'm just checking your hearing.

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Abraham Lincoln was the 16th Presient of the United States of America. The president to follow him was Andrew Johnson, president number 17.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

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The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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