Two muffins were in an oven. Neither of them said anything because they are inanimate objects. After they were finished baking, they were pulled out and set to cool on a counter to be eaten at a later time.

Why do women where make-up and perfume? because they are ugly and they smell bad.

I always tell people " I have the heart of a child! " Then I continue "It's in a jar on my desk"

Q: Whats the difference between a baby and a watermelon A: Ones fun to beat with a sledgehammer, the other ones a watermelon

The President, a terrorist, a student, and a genius were on a crashing plane. They all died.

Amputations.

Do you know that car over there? No.

What is 18 inches long and makes a woman scream all night? Crib death.

Why was six afraid of seven? Because seven had a raging hard-on and was leering at him.

What's red and invisible? No tomatoes.

Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 was infamous for stealing people's laundry, and 6 was insecure about his bare body

Why is 6 afraid of 7... Because 7 raped her little sister

What's better than winning a Gold Medal in the Special Olympics? Not being handicapped in the first place.

Two scientists walk into a bar. The first scientist says, "I'll have some H2O." The second scientist says, "I'll have H2O too." The bartender gives them both water, realizing that H2O2 is poisonous and that the second scientist must have simple worded his request poorly.

Did you hear about the red ship and the blue ship that collided? Everyone on board died.

What did the anti-joke say? Nothing for it is an anti-joke which is a group of word formed to create a sentence and sentences cannot speak.

Chuck Norris can get a nuke in Black Ops.

Knock Knock Who is it? Me, I forgot my keys on the way out oh ok...

Wanna Hear A Joke ? Afgan

Why can't penguins fly? ......It is against their evolutionary state.

What did the town guard say to the adventurer? "I used to be an adventurer like you, but then I got a full-time job so that I could support my family and spend more time with my children."

What do you call two Mexicans playing basketball? Two young men ignoring societies expectations of them and instead choosing to play the sport they enjoy the most.

Duncan Traywick is hilarious.

how do you kill jesus? with a knife

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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