Whats big, tall and fat? Most of America.

thumb_up thumb_down +31

Roses are burning, Violets are burning, my house is on fire

thumb_up thumb_down +31

What's worse than a bee sting? Two bee stings. What's worse than two bee stings? The Holocaust. What's worse than the Holocaust? Three bee stings.

thumb_up thumb_down +31

How many dislikes can this get?

thumb_up thumb_down +27

What do you do to a duck with no bill? Please, leave the duck alone, it's bad enough for him having no bill.

thumb_up thumb_down +27

Knock, Knock. Who's there? Disc . Disc Who. Disconnected.

thumb_up thumb_down +27

Why didnt the kid go in the pool? Because there was no pool!!

thumb_up thumb_down +25

What was the woman doing in the kitchen? Investigating a murder..

thumb_up thumb_down +25

Q:why are lamas cool? A:because m&m's are poisoned with deadly dosages of viagra.

thumb_up thumb_down +25

Okay so two penquins are sitting in a bathtub when one asks the other "Hey pass the soap!". The other one jokingly replies "what do I look like a typewriter?"

thumb_up thumb_down +25

What do a duck and an elephant have in common? They're both yellow. Except for the elephant.

thumb_up thumb_down +25

Why did the chicken cross the road? He was running. From the forest. That hell hole. He had got away, but he could remember. The darkness. The silence. Until the unmistakable scream of the guns and then- The Running. The Screaming. The Blood, oh the blood. Seeing Charlie. Oh, that damned soul Charlie. The bullet went right- But that was long ago. So long. But sometimes, in the silence, Chicken remembers. The Running. The Screaming. The Blood. And he screams.

thumb_up thumb_down +25

What did the boy with no arms and legs get for Christmas? A Kinect

thumb_up thumb_down +25

Real jokes.

thumb_up thumb_down +25

whats gay ? you

thumb_up thumb_down +23

The government wants us to stop using gas and be eco friendly. Tell that to Hitler.

thumb_up thumb_down +23

Why didn't the skeleton cross the road? He didn't have the necessary mental ability or muscle structure to complete said task.

thumb_up thumb_down +23

A man walks into a bar. End of story.

thumb_up thumb_down +23

Women's Golf

thumb_up thumb_down +23

How did the ruttabaga believe itself to be a ruttabaga? Because it was in fact NOT a ruttabaga, but some self-aware individual with delusions.

thumb_up thumb_down +23

Why is the world round? Because oranges are purple.

thumb_up thumb_down +21

Yo mama so fat she died

thumb_up thumb_down +21

A man goes to the pound to adopt a dog and sees a very shaggy dog and says "WOW! Thats a shaggy dog I'll take it!" So the man takes home his new dog and decides to enter the dog in the towns anual shaggy dog contest. and wins. After winning the town shaggy dog contest he moves up to the county shaggy dog contest. theres no competition. Now the man and his dog enter into the state shaggy dog contest, the states shaggiest dogs are all competing. the man wins. Finally the man and his dog are in the prestigious national shaggy dog contest. The judge walks up to the man and says "your dog isn't very shaggy"

thumb_up thumb_down +21

What did the little boy get for Christmas? Nothing, hes Jewish.

thumb_up thumb_down +21

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops