A Fish walks into a bar. It died of oxygen starvation.

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What did the father tell his son on his death bed? Nothing. He was hit by a car and was now a vegetable.

Homosexual babies? It's a choice

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An English man, an Irishman and a Scotsman walk into a bar. They each buy a pint and talk about their day.

why did jimmy fall off the swing? because he was a tree.

What did Santa Claus say to the young boy on Christmas Day? Santa Claus is a myth, that was actually a pedophile.

A blond walked into a bar. A guy picked her up and then they had sex.

What did the blind, deaf and dumb kid get for his birthday? Broken arms and legs

The little mouse lifted the giant Elephant up so the Elephant could reach the bag of snacks, but then the Elephant said: I cant reach it, you must be tired so lets switch places... Squish: Squish! Elephant: Mouse! Where are you! *looks at "squish" NO! THIS WAS NOT THE WAY THE JOKE WAS SUPPOSED TO BE!!!!!!! Moral: Elephants cant talk...

There was a man who had a camel, but one day he lost his camel. He wanted to go and look for it but he couldnt because he had to go to work. So the next morning he went to look for his camel. He went over the road and saw a gate, but he couldnt through because he had to go to work. The next morning he went over the road, through the gate and saw a forest, but he couldnt through because he had to go to work. The next morning he went over the road, through the gate, through the forest and saw a hill,but he couldnt go down the hill because he had to go to work. The next morning he went over the road, through the gate, through the forest,over the hill and saw a river,but he couldnt go over the river because he had to go to work. The next morning he went over the road, through the gate, through the forest,over the hill, over the river and saw a house, but he couldnt go to the house because he had to go to work. The next morning he went over the road, through the gate, through the forest,over the hill, over the river, to the house and saw a door, but he couldnt knock on the door because he had to go to work. The next morning he went over the road, through the gate, through the forest,over the hill, over the river, to the house, knocked on the door, and saw a man, but he couldnt speak to the man because he had to go to work. The next morning he went over the road, through the gate, through the forest,over the hill, over the river, to the house, knocked on the door, saw a man, and asked the man, "have you seen my camel?", but the man couldnt respond because he had to go to work The next morning he went over the road, through the gate, through the forest,over the hill, over the river, to the house, knocked on the door, saw a man, and asked the man, "have you seen my camel?", and the man said, "no"

A tree walks into a bar. But it is a dead tree so it actually didn't

how many jews did hitler kill during the holocaust? too many jews

What's the best joke of all? YOUR SOCIAL LIFE!!!!!!!

A plane crashes on the border of the United States and Canada. Where do they bury the survivors? Why would they bury the survivors? THEY'RE ALIVE

What do you call a black person playing basketball? An athlete.

the iPod hand is such a great deal It's only seven ninety-nine..........................................ninety nine for one hundredth of a dinosaur wait a minute...

A: Ask me if im a fire hydrant. B: Are you a fire hydrant? A: No...

Why did the plane crash? The pilot was a bagel.

A man walks into a pet shop. He says to the shopkeeper, "Excuse me, do you have any dogs going cheap?" The shopkeeper replies "We feel that we price our animals reasonably, but the cheapest type of dog we have is £50." The man realises that, unfortunately, he cannot afford a dog so instead he purchases a goldfish. It wasn't the same.

Why did the plane crash? Because the pilot was a loaf of bread.

A man walks into a bar. End of story.

I ENJOY MASTURBATING

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

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The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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