What's big, grey and can't swim? A castle

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What do you call a black lifeguard? Ironic.

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A cat fell out of a really tall tree. It didn't land on its feet.

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What's not red? No tomatoes.

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how many fish does it take to turn on a lightbulb None, lightbulbs dont work in the ocean

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I told a woman to make me a turkey sandwich. Of course she complied since I was at Subway.

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???????????????????????????? ????????????????????????????? ????????????????????????????? ????????????????????????????? ????????????????????????????? ????????????????????????????? ????????????????????????????? ????????????????????????????? ????????????????????????????? ????????????????????????????? ????????????????????????????? ????????????????????????????? ????????????????????????????? ????????????????????????????? ????????????????????????????? ????????????????????????????? ????????????????????????????? ????????????????????????????? ????????????????????????????? ????????????????????????????? ????????????????????????????? ????????????????????????????? I cant make a good joke.

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what do you call a cup?... a cup

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GONNA

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-Knock knock -Come on in!

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A man walks into a bar. He buys a drink and then goes home and beats his wife.

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How did the fat man die? Clogged arteries leading to a heart attack.

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ps3

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Why was John sad? His parents were murdered.

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Q: What happens when you throw a green rock in the Red Sea? A: It gets wet.

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What do you call a fish without an eye? fsh.

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Why did the black homeowner default on his house? He was paying significantly more in mortgage than the actual market value of the home, since he purchased his property before the housing bubble. He carried out a cost/benefit analysis and derived the conclusion that he was effectively destroying his own wealth by paying his mortgage bills.

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What did batman say to robin before they got in the car? Get in the car.

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how does peploe get around they walk

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I'm not as random as you think i salad.

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What did Helen Keller's parents do to punish her? They gave her a stern talking to and then grounded her for a couple days.

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How can you tell if a woman is dead? She has no pulse.

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Do you know that car over there? No.

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What's brown and sticky? A stick.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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