what did the joke say to the anti-joke? do you want to fight

why can't Helen Keller drive? because she's a women

"did you hear about the midget's self-murder?" "No, what happend?" "He jumped off the curb"

What's the difference between your mom and a table? The table isn't a whore.

What do you call a black person trying to swim? Wet.

*ring ring ring* hello? This is a robbery... Dum dum dum.... (hangs up) *beep beep beep*

A women gets a call saying her only daughter is trapped inside a burning building. She runs as fast as she can too her car before she realizes... women can't drive due to their role in society.

Hey what time is it. 3:15

Q: Why is the sun so bright? A: Because it reads books!

What do a grape and a reindeer have in common? They're both purple, except the reindeer.

Are you a homophobe? No, I'm cake. ,.

Two muffins are in the oven, one looks at the other and says, "it sure is hot in here." The other responds, "AAhHH a TALKING MUFFIN."

A handicapped man rolls into a bar. He buys a drink, talks for a while, and rolls out.

What's worse then biting into an apple and finding a worm? Finding half a worm and wondering where the other half is. o.O

How do you get your wife to stop nagging? chop off her head

Why isn't Neil Patrick Harris like Barney Stinson in real life? Because he's gay

potato farming

What's has 4 wheels But ain't a blue car A red car

Whats black, white, and read all over? Micheal Jackson reading a book while painting himself red.

why was the girl in the corner with a knife? she's an emo

What do you call a man who just came home from a 72-hour work shift ? You don't call him, you let him sleep.

Whats worse than breaking your pencil? Getting a cactus shoved up your ass.

What does a person that is fasting get for Christmas? Food.

Listen I know you're a cat and I'm a cat but I know we can be friends

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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