What is the best thing about having sex with twenty-seven year old's? There's twenty of them

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So there was a pirate, he got shot in the back. And when he got shot he turned to his freind (fellow pirate) and said i have been shot and there is a pretty good chance i will die.

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How do you realize your life is over? You don't, but the coroner does.

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What did the husband tell his obese wife? I love you honey

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Why can't Jimmy drive the tractor? Because Jimmy has no legs. Why doesn't he have any legs? Because he's a potato.

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dumbledore says,"today we will learn new spells,any questions?" a student says,"are you serious?" dumbledore says,"no he is in jail for a crime he didn't commit,sort of like the a-team."

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What's black and white and red all over? A newspaper with some red stuff on it.

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Patiant: Doctor Doctor i feel like a pair of curtains Doctor: ok Patiant: what shall i do ? Doctor: Go how and stop wasting my time

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why did a latino decide to eat green apple? i don't know that's what i'm asking

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Why did video kill the radio star? He slept with videos wife.

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Two gay guys go into a bedroom, in different houses at different times.

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What do you say to the man with lopsided balls? I am terribly sorry, your condition has most certainly left you socially alienated and confused.

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What's your name? You tell me.

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what do you call four black people in a red sleeping bag? -a very snug sleeping bag as they can rarely fit more then one person comfortably

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How does a black man make an anti joke? www.anti-joke.com/submit

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What did the vapyre eat for dinner? Nothing, they dont exist.

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Why did little susie fall off the swing? because she had no arms. Knock knock who's there? not susie

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Why was the blond looking at the orange juice box? Because she was reading the nutritional content of orange juice.

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What did Santa get for a young boy? A gun. What did Santa get for the young boys sister? Nothing, the boy shot Santa. Who sent out presents the next Christmas? Not Santa.

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What did Helen Keller's parents do to punish her? They gave her a stern talking to and then grounded her for a couple days.

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What happened when the Asian girl got an 89 on her Test? Her parents kicked her out of their house.

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How did the chicken cross the road? On it's chicken wings.

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Hey, want to hear a joke? Women's Rights

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Whats worse than meeting kim kardashian? everything shes the hottest freakin celeb there is

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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