why cant blondes water ski.......... because whenever they split their legs they feel somthing wet

thumb_up thumb_down +21

What do you call a muslim behind the controls of an airliner? A pilot you rascist.

thumb_up thumb_down +21

What did the white man hand to the mexican? His college degree because the mexican had completed all four years of college with a 4.0 GPA.

thumb_up thumb_down +21

Why did the Mexican cross the road? He was on his way to America Why did the black man cross the road? He was just running to his car you racist.....after he had robbed the bank

thumb_up thumb_down +17

Roses are red, Violets are PURPLE.

thumb_up thumb_down +17

What is black and hangs from a tree in my backyard? My neighbors children.

thumb_up thumb_down +15

How are a plum and a rabbit alike? Theyre both purple except for the rabbit.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

Osama Bin Laden dies.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

Your mother is so ugly that your father no lomger finds her attractive

thumb_up thumb_down +13

What do you call a black guy flying an airplane? A pilot.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

Nathan Gooderson.

thumb_up thumb_down +11

Why was the man running from the cops? His car broke down.

thumb_up thumb_down +11

a man walks into a bar, only it was an alternate universe so there were dogs running the bar. the bartender dog called human control because it was unsanitary to have a human in a bar. the human was then escorted out by another dog and was taken to a hotel where he received no continental breakfast.

thumb_up thumb_down +11

What did the doctor tell the boy with no arms or legs? I'm sorry, you have terminal cancer.

thumb_up thumb_down +11

Why don't they sell pharmaceuticals in the rain forest? Because it is too sparsely populated and not economically viable.

thumb_up thumb_down +11

How do you beat someone in a video game? You win it.

thumb_up thumb_down +11

What did the women order for dessert? Pie.

thumb_up thumb_down +9

What's the difference between your mom and a table? The table isn't a whore.

thumb_up thumb_down +9

Anti jokes.

thumb_up thumb_down +9

What did the robot say to the centipede? Stop being a centipede. It's funny because the robot has no arms.

thumb_up thumb_down +9

WHY DID THE KID RID HIS BRICK HE WAS BLIND

thumb_up thumb_down +7

Roses are red, violets are blue, I have Alzheimer's, Cheese on toast.

thumb_up thumb_down +7

Life is like a box of chocolates, it doesn't last as long for fat people...

thumb_up thumb_down +7

Why is 6 afraid of 7? Six hasn't been the same since he left Vietnam. Every time he closes his eyes, he's sees Charlie hiding in the darkness of the forest. Not that you could ever see those bastards, mind you. They were fast and they knew their way around the jungle. He remembers the looks on the boy's faces when they walked into that village and... oh Jesus. He shouldn't think about that now. Sometimes he still hears Tex's slow southern drawl. He remembers the smell of Brooklyn's cigarettes. He always had a pack of Luckys. But the boys are gone now... he knows that. It's--it's just that he forgets sometimes. And sometimes the way that seven looks at him... it makes him think. Sets him on edge. And he feels like he's back there... In the jungle... In the darkness. Seven has a hook for a hand as well, which is very scary.

thumb_up thumb_down +5

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops