What's huge, gray, and has a trunk and wings. An elephant with wings glued to it.

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- If I could rearrange the alphabet, I would put U and I together. - You don't need to because N and O are already together. - Then maybe a cyber-relationship would work. - Why ? - Look at your keyboard, U and I are next to each other.

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A woman is getting in the shower but the the doorbell rings so she puts on her towel and gets the door a man is there asking for sugar. Then she gets back into the shower then the doorbell rang again so she puts on her towel and anwsers the door another man is there he asked for some batteries she gave him some and went back to the shower. Then she hears the doorbell again she thought since there wasn't anybody else that lived on her street she decided to just go to the door without her towel so she answers the door thinking the blindmans there and it was the police man.

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What do you get when you put a baby in a blender? A life sentence

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It's a scientific fact that if you took all the veins out of your body, and lined them up end to end, you would die.

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Roses are #FF0000 Violets are #0000FF

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What did the homeless man get for Christmas? Nothing..

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Why didn't the boy run the marathon? He was cripple.

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A man walks into a bar. End of story.

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Your Mom... is a very nice lady who makes good cookies

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A man walked into a haunted house and screamed. He had stepped on a nail.

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Q: What is worse than loosing your arms? A: Dying

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What do you call a file named pedo? A. Pedobear B. Toast C. Pedofile

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Why did the Octopus jump off the bridge? To breathe

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Yeah, totally.

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the blonde choked o a gummy bear. What happened next? she went to the hospital

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Why'd the chicken cross the road? To get to your house. Knock knock. Whose there? A chicken.

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Why is the horse gay. He rapes 3 children

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What's one thing a black man can't have? White skin

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Whats worse than getting in a 30 MPH car accident? Getting in a 40 MPH car accident.

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Steering Wheel Face.

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Last night I had consensual sex with my long term girlfriend in the missionary position. It lasted approximately 4 minutes before I ejaculated into the durex extra safe condom.

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ME: HEY ZACH DO YOU KNOW WHO LIKES YOU................... ZACH: NO!... WHO.... ME: DO YOU REALLY WANT TO KNOW??? ZACH:....YEAH!!!!!!!!!! ME: OKAYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYY NOBODY!!!!!!!!!!!!! HAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHA

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When life gives you lemons, throw them away. Nobody likes lemons.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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