What's grosser than gross? Grosser. What's grosser than that? Grossest.

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Why did the dinosaur jump off the cliff? Because he was mental

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How do u know when someone is horny? look at there pants

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What band protects hope in current music? Nickelback.

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A Jew, a Muslim, and a Christian walk into a bar, they then sit down and discuss the various political factors driving a wedge between unity, peace, harmony and understaning between their religions. They resolve that despite the differences in religious belief, essentially they are all the same, and want happy existences with family and friends, and that equality and peace between religions should be a prime focus of religious institutions and governments. They then band together to criticize aetheists, who present a much more probable explanation for why the Universe is the way it is. An eavesdropper then mulls over the idea that the various religions represented behind him are willing to debate philosophical standpoints, so long as their monotheistic beliefs are not contradicted.

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A horse walks into a bar. The bartender says, "Why the long face?", laughs at his own joke, then calls animal control.

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Q: My mom's getting really old and It's starting to get hard to shop for her. Any ideas? A: You should get her a coffin.

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Your moms so fat, she's not skinny

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There was 3 women, a blonde, a brunette, and a redhead. I don't know the rest of the story but the ending was when they guy came all over their faces.

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What is the difference between a Jew and pizza? a pizza doesn't yell when it goes into an oven

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Why do mexicans jump the gate Because theres a sale at chipotle

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How many ADD kids dose it take to screw in a light bulb? one; the attention deficit disorder dose not take away the ability too screw in a light bulb.

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If Roger buys 109 candy bars and eats 65, what does he have? Diabetes.

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How do you kill a blue elephant? How? With a blue elephant gun. How do you kill a pink elephant? How? You hold it's nose until it turns blue, then you shoot it with a blue elephant gun. How do you kill a orange elephant? How? You can't, they don't exist. How do you kill a white elephant? How? You tickle it till it turns pink, then you hold it's noose until it turns blue, then you shoot it with a blue elephant gun.

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Why doesn't stevie wonder play snooker? Because it's not very popular in the US.

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Whats worse then your penis in your mouth? Your mom in your penis.

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How do you realize your life is over? You don't, but the coroner does.

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What did the husband tell his obese wife? I love you honey

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Why did the cow go moo, because its a cow

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My dog has no nose, so how does it smell? It can't, I just told you it has no nose.

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I'm not wearing underwear Why not Cause I have built in underwear

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i am a duck. are you a duck. yes i am a duck.

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You say you can read me like a book, well the jokes on you. I am not a book.

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Why is Ellen so funny? Because she is a comedian.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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