An elderly lady walks into an elevator. She falls over and I kick her in the head.

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What's funny about suicide? Nothing, that's horrible.

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A hot girl walks past a boy and the boy turns around and watches her pass. The girl sees the boy staring and asks with a slight attitude, "What are you looking at?", to which the boy replied, "Well, I noticed you walking towards me and I couldn't help but think 'Hmm..she looks familiar. Have I seen her at school? No. Work? No. Somewhere else? Perhaps.' I then concluded that I've never seen you before and then you turned around and asked me what I was looking at. What are YOU looking at?"

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What's worse than missing your favorite TV show? 9/11.

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What is the difference between a bench and a mexican? the bench is an object

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What do you call a deaf person whom is behind the wheel of a car about to run off a cliff? ....

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A man walks into a bar. End of story.

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Why was the boy upset? Because he has a frog stapled to his face.

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Q How do you make pie. A You cook it

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Why doesn't Santa come in the Summer? Because it's not Christmas.

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A man walks into a pet shop. He says to the shopkeeper, "Excuse me, do you have any dogs going cheap?" The shopkeeper replies "We feel that we price our animals reasonably, but the cheapest type of dog we have is £50." The man realises that, unfortunately, he cannot afford a dog so instead he purchases a goldfish. It wasn't the same.

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What did the lover say to his lover? I love you

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What begins with "f" and ends with "uck"? A curse word.

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A man walks in a bar. He walks out.

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An Asian oceanographer went scuba diving in the Pacific Ocean. Three days later the coast guard found his remains torn apart by sharks.

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why is 5 afraid of 6? it isnt

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I ENJOY MASTURBATING

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The pennis has a tuff life, his best friend is a pussy, his neighbors is an A hole, his family is nuts, and his master beats him.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Why did we start questioning the philosophical reasoning of chickens?

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what's the difference between a ferrari and a pile of dead babies? I don't have a Ferrari in my garage.

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World peace

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You play the piano? What more can you do? Sounds complicated but try me.

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What's green and has wheels? Grass...I was just lying about the wheels.

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arse

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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