GONNA

1,2 Freddy's Coming For You 3'4 Better Lock Your Doors 5'6 Grab Your Crucifix 7'8 Stay Up Late 9'10 Never Sleep Again Bonus 11'12 He's Gonna See You In Hell

You: I have a really funny Knock Knock joke but you have to start it. Someone Else: Okay, Knock Knock You: Who's there? (now watch their face as they become confused)

What's worse than dropping your ice cream on the floor? Getting the end of your penis stapled

How do you know when there's a terrorist in an airport? There's a camel in the parking lot.

What do you say when you wake up in the middle of the night to see your TV floating in midair? "I should probably lay off the hallucinogens."

What do you call a black armless legless man I Don't know but im kind of hungry

You're mom is so slutty, she has sex with many men.

There once was a man from Peru Whose limericks stopped at line two (I sense the public demanding an encore) There once was a man from Verdun There's also a limerick about Emperor Nero, but I can't tell it to you.

Q. What is brown and sticky? A. Creosote.

A man walks into a bar, then he realized he didn't have any money, so he walked out.

What is pink and fluffy? Pink Fluff.

???????????????????????????? ????????????????????????????? ????????????????????????????? ????????????????????????????? ????????????????????????????? ????????????????????????????? ????????????????????????????? ????????????????????????????? ????????????????????????????? ????????????????????????????? ????????????????????????????? ????????????????????????????? ????????????????????????????? ????????????????????????????? ????????????????????????????? ????????????????????????????? ????????????????????????????? ????????????????????????????? ????????????????????????????? ????????????????????????????? ????????????????????????????? ????????????????????????????? I cant make a good joke.

What's worse than a School Bus accident? The Holocaust.

why did the chicken cross the road? I don't know, you tell me.

What did the man say to his son? Hello, son.

Why did the black homeowner default on his house? He was paying significantly more in mortgage than the actual market value of the home, since he purchased his property before the housing bubble. He carried out a cost/benefit analysis and derived the conclusion that he was effectively destroying his own wealth by paying his mortgage bills.

how do you keep a blond in sespence you dont tell her

dead babies

What's funny about suicide? Nothing, that's horrible.

Why doesn't Santa come in the Summer? Because it's not Christmas.

Of two wrongs don't make a right what do they make? I don't know but three rights make a left

what did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? where's my tractor?

A plane carrying an Englishman, an Irishman, and a Scotsman is destined to crash unless some weight is lost. First they drop the spare engine, but there is still too much weight. Then they drop the luggage, but still there is too much weight. All three men then jump out. The plane crashes anyway.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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