When life gives you lemons you leave the earth in search of what strange lifeform sent you them.

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How did the ruttabaga believe itself to be a ruttabaga? Because it was in fact NOT a ruttabaga, but some self-aware individual with delusions.

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Why did the baby cross the street. Because he was attached to the chicken.

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Fuck her

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What do you call a pelican with no wings? A dead pelican

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A man yells at the top of the Grand Canyon, "Heyoooooo" He hears His voice echo multiple times. He yells again, "Heyoooooo" This time he hears his echo and a girl yell "heyo" back to him from within the canyon. He looks down. He falls. A mountain goat breaks his fall. The man is so thankful for the goat. He says, " Thank you goat! You saved my life!" The goat then pulls out a gun, and shoots him thrice. The man dies.

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This is a humorous joke, you will laugh.

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Last night I saw an elephant in my pajamas. I don't know why I went to the zoo in my pajamas.

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What did the man say when he dropped an apple on his foot? That might have caused some minor discomfort had I not been wearing shoes.

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Don't rape me!

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where do the women go? the womanarium

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name-Sally-Sue What I am good at in school: readin' annnd...math. What I need to work on in school: spelin

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why couldnt helen keller drive? because shes a woman.

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Why did the dog go in the bar? Because the door was left open

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shut up

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You want to know what is worse than having a teen parent? Being a teen parent.

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Why did the Koala fall out of the tree? Cause it was dead. Why did the second Koala fall off the tree? Cause it was also dead. Why did the third Koala fall off the tree? It thought the other two were playing a game. Why did the motorcyclist end up in the hospital? He was attacked by falling Koalas!

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Do you know what Chuck Norris does for a living? He's an actor, I also heard he's quite good with martial arts.

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My Bologna has a first name, it's Tim.

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I came.

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What do you call a black man in a pumpkin patch? His name is Bill.

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What's the easiest way to kill a blond? You stab her.

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A women gets a call saying her only daughter is trapped inside a burning building. She runs as fast as she can too her car before she realizes... women can't drive due to their role in society.

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i like my women how i like my coffee ....i dont like coffee

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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