Your mom is so fat, when she sat on a lump of coal she didn't realize she sat on a lump of coal.

What do you call Jesus Christ? Jesus Christ.

I got a joke. What did the Platypus say to the Policeman?" "What a ridiculous question, Platypus's can't talk.

Patrick is gay

A man witnessed a car crash. He was traumatized

"How come the week takes so long but the weekend goes by so fast" "Because there are five days in the week and two in the weekend"

2 gingers went to a pumpkin patch... And nobody ever found them( life lesson, don't take your ginger to a pumpkin patch)

Why did the person play his XBOX 360? because he felt like it.

how much dub would a dubstep step if a dubstep could step dub? purple

Why is Helen Keller a bad driver? Because her inability to see or hear makes her an extremely dangerous road hazard.

Q:A man has 100 chocolate bars he eats 93 of them. What has he got now? A:Diabetes

Why doesn't Santa come in the summer? Because it's not Christmas.

What do you call Obama? - the president

knock knock who's there a black person SHIT!!!!

once three middle easterns were walking down the street bomb bomb bomb

What do you call an insect that has 8 legs? A spider.

A small plane is carrying three passengers: a young boy scout, a priest, and the smartest black man on earth. Due to improper planning, there are only three parachutes on the plane. The engines cut and the pilot takes a parachute and jumps out of the plane. The black man says, "I am the smartest black man in the world. I need to live." He takes a parachute and jumps out of the plane. The priest says to the boy scout, "Son, you take the last parachute. I have lived a full life." After a very touching moment, the boy scout puts on the parachute and jumps out of the plane. Minutes later, the priest dies a horrific death as the plane crashes into the desert.

In Soviet Russia! People were much more finacially secure than they are now.

What is the difference between Terri Schaivo and a basket of rotting vegetables? The rotting vegetables aren't edible.

Why do you bury an Asian on the side of a hill? Because he's dead.

whats more serious than rape... the holocaust

No, I don't have ADH...- Oh look, a butterfly!!

Knock, Knock. Who's there? Disc . Disc Who. Disconnected.

A man goes to the pound to adopt a dog and sees a very shaggy dog and says "WOW! Thats a shaggy dog I'll take it!" So the man takes home his new dog and decides to enter the dog in the towns anual shaggy dog contest. and wins. After winning the town shaggy dog contest he moves up to the county shaggy dog contest. theres no competition. Now the man and his dog enter into the state shaggy dog contest, the states shaggiest dogs are all competing. the man wins. Finally the man and his dog are in the prestigious national shaggy dog contest. The judge walks up to the man and says "your dog isn't very shaggy"

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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